Reviews for Valentine - FanFiction.Net

Reviews For: Valentine

GlassOnion 2008-03-25 ch 2,	abuseIt's well-writen and you have a great style, but... sorry, I think Vetinari is out of character.
fledge 2007-10-19 ch 2,	abuseIndeed, Vetinari and emotions are not exactly the first combination that comes to mind... Interesting start - you might give us a bit of an idea about Valentine's looks, though. And it is indeed a bit irritating to see her named by her surname. It's some time since you started this, are you going to continue it?
the ness-ness 2007-08-23 ch 2,	abuseAs much as I love Vetinari, I would hate to be put in that position...espcially after my boyfriend broke up with me. But I suppose she does need the expirence... ~the ness-ness~
Morloth 2007-08-06 ch 2,	abuseHurray another vetinari + girl! And a good one at that! Update and I’ll give you a nice review again..or just a cookie, whatever you need most. Oh lovely! is trying hypnoses UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE…..
fyredancer 2007-05-30 ch 2, anon.	abuseOkay. I honestly try to have an open mind when reading fics, I really do, but this...I'm sorry, but this story is a complete, total Mary Sue. Which, in itself, isn't completely terrible, but it gets that when when almost EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER is OOC. Carrot--Carrot has never exchanged a "knowing glance" with anyone in his life. It's been expressly stated several times, actually, that CARROT BARELY EVEN KNOWS WHAT A "KNOWING GLANCE" IS, and he certainly doesn;t recognize them when he sees them. And Vetinari is completely OOC. He would never express his feelings with Angua and Carrot there, vertainly, as well as a strange watchwoman he doesn't know. And he doesn't ANGST. And Valentine? You tried, but...honestly, you should try reading the books, getting a feel for what the characters are actually like, and starting over. WITHOUT making Nobby the designated pathetic character, this time. And learn how to use a godsdamned comma! (I know four exclamation points are the sign of a sick mind, but this drove me to it).
Eleya Jade 2007-05-17 ch 2,	abuseHi, I think your story will be great, if you write on soon because your writing-style matches almost perfect with Pratchett's. I enjoy the beginning of your story. I hope you will update soon, pleas. :-) Greez from Austria, Eleya
jaz 2007-05-11 ch 1, anon.	abusevery good, maybe not worthy of terry pratchet but certainly far better than anything i could do, excellent use of his style by the way, and the characters are spot on
Rack 2007-05-06 ch 2,	abuseO. Interesting concept, certaintly. Update soon!
Big Cat 2007-05-01 ch 2,	abuseThat's gonna be funny. Valentine-matchmaker? He-he! Let's see. One word: I don't really think Vetinari would EVER express any feelings to a stranger (though Vimes&co are not entirely strangers, but in a way they are). He's been selfcontrolling for years and he's been gods damn good politician. Politicians don't 'feel'. They think and react. It sounds little bit boring here and there, knowing Vetinari, but not THAT boring as you think. That's not an insult, this is build-up criticism. I hope you will take it right. Generally the chapter is very good, not that good as the first one, but I have some hopes for the future. It definitely smells on Mery-Sue, but what the hell. Let it. I repeat again - I hope this 'woman' would be clever one. sighs Cheers, I like it. Go on, and please, don't hate me criticising your work. I am just damn perfectionist (I hate that)! Cat
MJ MOD 2007-05-01 ch 2,	abuseThe Uberwald woman decided to marry a Klatchian instead of the Patrician?! I can't believe it. A Klatchian?! Wow! Vetinari is asking the Watch to act as Matchmaker? Why them? Valentine will be the Matchmaker? Poor girl.
MJ MOD 2007-05-01 ch 1,	abuseInteresting beginning. What on Earth did Kiri find in Ryan?! Snot bubbles?! Eeww! Who is Vetinari angry with? Who is daring to do something to him?
InsanityInside 2007-05-01 ch 2,	abuseHm... I'm not sure... Vetinari seems a bit OOC. But the story is quite well-written, so there is hope. Maybe you can make it all work. II(:
Big Cat 2007-04-30 ch 1,	abuseYou made me smile. No, really, you made me smile. This piece is so good, so fresh. I have no words to explain how grateful I feel after reading your work. This is one of the best I've personally EVER read. Valentine is an interesting character, no wonder Vimes has hopes for her - she is just like him, but female. She knows the street well and I'm not in doubt she could feel the streets under her boots (or whatever). I like the dialogue between Valentine and Carrot. Very clever one, I guess you have been investigating a lot before writing it. Good knowledge, if not. What does Vetinari get angry on? Who is 'she'? I hope it isn't another Mery-Sue, but if it is, please, make it a bit more intelligent than the previous ones. I have nothing against to see the Patrician emocionally envolved, but be sure he deserves someone at lest as smart as he is. Very good beginning. Go on. I would be reading you. Cat
Jamieneo66 2007-04-30 ch 1,	abuseThat was quite good, i'm expecting the rest soon :) - JN66

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