I like it. Your style can get a bit stale sometimes, but, overall, it flows very well. It's nicely descriptive, too.

You follow the plot a bit too much. Line for line, almost. All of the random mentions of random sex was funny. Just about what I expected when I gave this story a try the first time, long ago, in the ToS section. Anyway, you've been trying to keep it 'realistic,' and, because of that, the randomness has slowly tapered off, making it more like a normal rewrite of the game.

...The LukeIon idea is awesome, though.
Sincerely,
~Shadow of Undine

Yayupdate. I think this chapter is by far the cutest. I love the Luke and Ion stuff, and I actually felt bad for poor Mieu.

Lookin' forward to the next chapter.

cute XD
I loved the IonLuke on the ending, keep it up =D

yay! ^^
this story is great so far! =D
You don't have to detail so much, however, since the more important is your own twist, right? =]
Keep it up!

Hahaha. Flirtatious Ion? How cute.

I love the idea of this story. Dunno what that says about me, but I'm always looking forward to next chapters. ;3

True fon masters, so far most of its same as game if not in spirit then structure. But, how about commenting on what I have different from the game?

WTF? almost all of this is the same as the game!

hm... yeah
i liked it! keep writing! XD
and seriously, u have guts to write this o.o
go go \o/

Disregard my last review!...
Srry

I couldn't bring myself to finish reading this...
It really is just so wrong on so many
different levels...
Where do you come up with this!?
It's wrong... T.T sob...
I'm sorry i just can't read this...

i saw your fic was deleted from the forums... but you'll keep it up, right?
anyway, what will be the 'pairings' (well, not pairings... more like who lukes gets to have fun with, beside tear, guy and van... XD)? just curious ^^
keep writing, i rly liked it!

I love this story. And I know why. But It's kinda hard to put it in words. Maybe because it has straightness /and/ gayness. Or maybe I'm just perverted and this makes me giggle like that. xD

Always looking forward to updates.

...I only have one thing to say...

"HOLY BLEEP!"

Okay, now that I'm done, I will do a real review.

This story seems very...interesting...so to say. I have played TOA numerous times, but I have never once imagined someone would do something like this! I normally don't like these types of stories, but you really have a way of describing things that keeps the reader interested, even if they don't want to be. You have an excellent writing style as well, I must say I'm imressed. I...actually hope you can continue this.

(Also, being the fangirl that I am, I actually like how you portrayed Guy. Yeah, I know...shoot me! Dx)

O.o
...
um... this is wrong...
I think...
Oh god i can't think right
this seems strngely hilarious...
But very wrong...
I cant't voice it any other way...
Y?...
T.T
I don't understand anymore!

what the bLeEp have you been smoking?