| Reviews for Trust and Betrayal |
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Naurtofan209 1/3/12 . chapter 1 I loved it keep up the good yeah I wont stop reading this story is aweasome:) |
Common Sense 10/25/11 . chapter 1 Bashing and cop-outs that everyone uses. Interesting? |
General16 4/21/11 . chapter 1Hi and thanks for a great start! I liked this chapter except for one thing: You keep switching between past and present tense when you write. It kinda messes up the pace and makes it a little confusing to read. Other than that, I thought it was just fine! Keep up the good work |
Guest 10/1/10 . chapter 1 simply good man what a chapter that was excellent |
ken 6/1/10 . chapter 1 Still pathetic, fuck that. It was beyond pitiful. So much for the equal of the S-ranked nins. Go kill yourself for even thinking of this shit |
ken 6/1/10 . chapter 1 Caught with the guard down? Thi is the best your super uber ANBU Naruto can do? The supposed equal to Itachi? That was fucking pathetic. FAIL |
nequam-tenshi 7/7/09 . chapter 1Ignorance leads to defeat-Konoha can be stupid |
Litany of Hate 4/25/09 . chapter 1This is so bad I can't even finish the first chapter! Easily one of the worst fics I have ever read. Not only are your characters completely OoC, but you are in desperate need of a proofreader and/or a 3rd grade education. Your prose is flat and uninspired, and I've scraped together better dialogue while crushed and bleeding to death (no seriously, I've done it). I also find myself wholly unable to suspend my disbelief to a point where I can even imagine this ridiculous 'plot' as anything other than laughable. I could go into more detail, but you're not worth the time. If I were to offer a suggestion it would be to delete this fic and read a book - in that order. Any book will do, really... you've nowhere to go but up. |
jordanmccombs 4/1/09 . chapter 1Man this is by far the best dark naruto fic I've been able to read. Please update |
fff 3/16/09 . chapter 1 This story has 6 reveiws that's the devil's number! I must change this! |
Grumpywinter 1/24/09 . chapter 1this was pretty good but i think you should have naruto become while more demonice to be more polite like not swearing all the time. but that just my opinion |
aaron 1/15/09 . chapter 1 update son. im starting to think you abandoned this story |
Kitsune Raider 12/19/08 . chapter 1This is really good. I hate whenever Naruto gets in trouble everbody stands by him. Now he's really got a reason to hate them. Well done. |
Book Mad TJ 10/6/08 . chapter 1Nice... |
AnotherFanfictionFailure 9/7/08 . chapter 1Hot damn, I haven't read this story in a long while (i deleted all my alerts)... Man there's such a shortage of quality stories these days, but reading this has given me hope once again :P I can't wait to see what Madara does now he's introduced himself and Konoha vs Naruto. Take care |
FBstrike1 8/1/08 . chapter 1 wow very well done |
Mystic 6 tailed Naruto 7/16/08 . chapter 1Yes kill them all Naruto! WAHAHAHAHA! They are filthy traitors! If I were naruto I'd just let the fox kill them! They must die! |
sion560 6/14/08 . chapter 1 that was really messed up. but the story is cool |
CrystalCipher 4/11/08 . chapter 1I like it!:D |
Sodapops 4/3/08 . chapter 1what a dramatic first chapter. i'm excited to see where this leads. |
The Chronic Masturbater 3/17/08 . chapter 1Woot Naruto is gonna bring down konoha |
Decertos 3/3/08 . chapter 1I spotted a couple of errors...both grammatic and otherwise, like the spelling of nauseous as "noxious", for instance...but I like the story so far. Good job, dude. |
DD 2/15/08 . chapter 1 This is confusing and pointless. |
Blah 2/11/08 . chapter 1 Ok, honestly I thought this story was gonna suck ass but it's pretty good, kudo's for u. for a minute i thought you were gonna make Ino insult him too. |
Starting a New Life 2/9/08 . chapter 1Nice! I like how you showed what all the Akatsuki memebers where up to. Curious to see if you end up showing all their battles. So Ino has completly changed her opinion of Naruto...nice. I wonder who the person is waiting for Naruto. I would guess it's Sasuke, but for some reason I don't think it is. So your Zetsu is awesome. I love the idea that he can split into his White and Black sides...would explain why he never had a partner...he was his own partner! Keep up the good work. Till next time |
black kitsune 1/30/08 . chapter 1 make him take away sakura and sasukes ability to reproduce NO MORE FUCKING UCHIHAS! |
Ndasuunye 1/21/08 . chapter 1WHew, this is good. Yet I fear that there will be some emotional output in the end of this storm. Still wonderful job. |
sadisticb00gers-Modus Pwnage 1/10/08 . chapter 1WHOA. i've only read the 1st chpter so far, but i just felt compelled to make a comment. this is INTENSE. no "naruto-is-sentenced-to-death-and-is-betrayed-by-e veryone" i've ever read has been this good. AWESOME job! . |
CrimsontheBloodyDemonKing 1/2/08 . chapter 1Awesome, and please update soon the story is very good. |
ChocohalicsAnonymous 1/1/08 . chapter 1this made me so sad. but i love stories like this, but only if they are well written. you did a great job so far. poor naruchan T_T |
VolpyroHarry 1/1/08 . chapter 1sweet jesus, dis is only da first chapter n i luv it! im adding it 2 my C2: Kyuubi-Induced Naruto! |
spedclass 12/28/07 . chapter 1Awesome chapter keep up the good work and update soon! |
emmy.raen 12/20/07 . chapter 1Hmm. Interesting... I still don't know what to think of this fic, so I guess that I'll keep on reading. :D |
JKGoblin 12/18/07 . chapter 1This lacks logic. First Tsunade could have had the coucil arrested and executed for calling Naruto demon in her precense. Then because every ninja can do a henge are so on. I suggest you correct those mistakes and come up with a new reason that everyone would suddenly hate Naruto, and that in it self is ridiculous. |
zonda 11/29/07 . chapter 1 i hope you update soon but i dont know anything about when naruto mangas come out because i lost intrest in the show and mangas a while ago so i hope it doesnt take much more because this is one of my favorite stories it is naruto how i always wanted to me cold, dark, emotion less not the annoying one but i wont rant about that anyway keep up the good work |
Demonkid 10/21/07 . chapter 1found it interesting... |
Hiroshima Namikaze 8/26/07 . chapter 1he better kill them all every one last one of them how can they do that! after all he did 4 him |
Halfas Rule 7/4/07 . chapter 1Powerful Naruto! Yeah! Are you going to make it where even though Naruto finds out that whoever was the one that framed him (I'm guessing it's Akatsuki) that he'll thank them and join their side? |
haggis 7/2/07 . chapter 1Man that first chapter was intense, it was awsome so much happened and Naruto has realized he has nothing basically no friends left. The only people would be Jiraiya, Teuchi, Ayame sand sibs and the people from the wave arc and maby Iruka and Tsunade. Im wondering where your going to go with it (if you keep writing) i liked the idea of him killing orichimaru and getting his ring and joining Atasuki but that would be helping Konoha out. Or he could just meet with them and they might just let him join due to him being strong enough. Or if you where planning on him getting revenge and destroying Konoha he could make like a pact with the Kyuubi and get like a fox contract and summon him :P. Another cool thing would be if he joined Atasuki and came accross is old ANBU team Tiger and Eagle and captured them and locked them up and toyed with there emotions or at least got one of them to come to an understanding he isn't the Kyuubi. Another thing is is there going to be any pairings coz i think a fem jinchuri would be cool if she got cought and naruto got a soft spot for her :P After that display on how everyone pretty much ganged up on him and tryed to kill him i cant see him wanted to help Konoha out if they get in trouble But other than that i hope you keep writing and update soon |
IncandescentOne 6/21/07 . chapter 1damn that was heart wrenching T_T was the red eyed guy Itachi/or/Leader of Akatsuki(are his eyes even red?) or someone new O_o but yeah, wow. awesome first chapter! |
molten 6/18/07 . chapter 1Its good, may I ask for a time line, like when will each chapter most likely be out? Of course it doesn't need to be accurate. So don't pressurize yourself if you give this estimate. |
amgknigth 6/18/07 . chapter 1wow its excellent |
Ralyn Longs 6/18/07 . chapter 1Great first chapter! /waiting for your next one, and make sure you don't abandon this story, it'd be a bloody shame ;) |
amac1688 6/17/07 . chapter 1interesting |
Raptor2001 6/17/07 . chapter 1i can't believe it trust and Betrayal is good .. please hurry up update i can't wait for it ... |
Reyinn 6/16/07 . chapter 1OMG! that was so sad! (but I LOVED it) |
Avatarofrage 6/16/07 . chapter 1huh, I can't help but see Naruto blowing up oto to vent some anger Also one way or another I don't see this as anywhere near enough to cause naruto to forsake his values I.E protecting his precious people, it just reduced the list significantly. Iruka never got mentioned so I assume he wasn't there to stand up for him, Jiraiya stood up for him, and one way or another he'll have some form of attatchment to Tsunade, although it will probably be laced with icy fury, oh and theres the sand sibs, and possibly Inari and his family, possibly, along with Teuchi and Ayame. Actually I can see teuchi packing up and moving away just to spite them, and make it possible for Naruto to see them once in a while. On regards to the story itself, its well written, although I can't help but feel that Lee would have said something, obviously your having him one way or another get involved with Akatsuki, actually having him kill Orochimaru to get his ring would be a good initation, but I'm getting ahead of myself. I only hope you manage to acuratley portray their interactions. As opposed to many fics where they're a big happy family, or a group of treacherous bloodthirsty freaks always out to stab each other in the back. If they where the latter then they wouldn't have shown such disgust with Orochimaru's betrayal, and the only one to actually kill another member of Akatsuki is/was Kakuzu(i think thats the heart guy's name). Great start, update soon |
Ero-kun 6/16/07 . chapter 1Both of Your stories are goddamn good, in my eyes You are really talented |
Yue Hime 6/12/07 . chapter 1omg... I find myself ready at everybody's throats... D: I hope that they all are going to die... well, it's really angst but I love the story ideas... update soon |
Morboe 6/12/07 . chapter 1Eh. bit to angsty for my taste. There are a number of mistakes spotted throughout. Teuchi took his time answering. “I have known him my entire life sir.” So the old man has known the 15 year old boy for his 40 years of life, That may not be the meaning behind it, but that's the way it comes across. A number of parts feel forced with slightly unrealistic dialog. Reasonable decent overall, just needs a beta and a few coats of polish. -Korrosive |
Alfredragon120 6/11/07 . chapter 1the best the greats story that I have read you should keep on going with this story |
Kai Dragoon 6/11/07 . chapter 1You know I hope you kill off some Konoha characters, cause that chapter was great and no future deaths would contradict it. |
Manna 6/10/07 . chapter 1 It's totally awesome! Will Naruto join Akatsuki? That would be sweet! You are a really good writer, update soon! |
animeflunky 6/10/07 . chapter 1... geez if i were naruto I would probably kill them all.. although im taking that might still hapen later in the story :) |
Zephyrical 6/10/07 . chapter 1Wow. What an explosive chapter. Twas somewhat cliche with the "civilian council" having more power than the Hokage. Last I remember, they were advisers and nothing more. Anyways it'll be interesting to see where this story goes next. It has potential. -Myst |
asdf 6/10/07 . chapter 1 wow...wow... can't wait for the next chapter! |
The great Khali 6/10/07 . chapter 1this is great pls keep up the good work I Cant wait to read more |
InTheYearOfTheCat 6/10/07 . chapter 1I like it, but there is too much pointless swearing. I mean, it's not like it adds anything to the story. I'm dissapointed in you. :( |
SurvivalHorror 6/10/07 . chapter 1Wow... now this is an AWESOME story. Even though you only have one chapter up at the moment, I am putting this under my favorites. Love what you got so far, I can't wait for Naruto to kick all of Konoha's ass. My only complaint is that I have to wait for the next chapter to be up. Please dont take long to update cuzz I can't wait for chapter 2. |
akume 6/10/07 . chapter 1 Kill them all! shouts at computer screen Maa, thanks for the story. |
ShrapnelMan 6/10/07 . chapter 1i've read a lot of naruto banished fics and i must say that this one has the best starting chapter i've read. theres a reason behind him being banished and there are plenty of 'witnesses' as well. just for the love of all that is good in the world don't have him go back to konoha and be like, "oh i forgive you and you and you for completely ruining my dream and life." i hope to read more of this and your other story as well. on a side note i'd like to add you're on your way to becoming one of the best naruto fanfic writers i've had the pleasure of reading. peace, Shrap. |