Like that plot. is too bad you have to finish it. oh well hope you write another one.

KEEP IT UP

NICE

THIS IS SWEET

Dear Author

Nice background for Sword Hunter.

Sword Hunter's past is dynamic; she started out sweet and innocent child (like anybody else). Then she has a skin condition that makes things complicated and things went horribly wrong as she grew older, people either got the wrong idea, or are jealous or hateful.
Then she falls in with bad company, since their the only people who are giving her a chance. TRAGIC.

Sometimes evil people speak the truth. In a Batman cartoon the maniacal Joker told his prisonor. “All it takes is one rotten day to turn a normal man into a monster. Well in my case, a rotten day and a chemical bath.”

Pain, confusion, rage twists the mind, and you become either become stronger, or crumble under pressure.

I have bad days (though not as bad as many people in the world) and sometimes wonder if that's a small taste if what super villains and madmen feel like before they became bad.

The wholesome standards are good.

Clean language.
The mature themes are handled well and don't trigger certain brain chemicals in the minds of the reader.

I hope this review has a good influence on you.

Data Seeker

Good to see another chappie!

I was hoping we'd see a bit more of Sword Hunter. She's always interested me the most out of the members of Team Sin, that sadistic girl. XD

Never tire of being a Lyoko fan, and never tire of waiting for each new update.
They're worth it.
Great work with this one.

Update, wee^^ Awesome, SH background really who'd have though it?

-Gabs.

Dear Author

First I want to thank you for explaining things I didn't understand in the pervious chapters.

The following chapters are dymatic.

The parts involving team Sin are interesting. Someone from Blood lust past shows up. Sword hunter has serious issues to deal with.

The following scenes with Yumi and Aleta and Jermemy are very intense and emotional. The others are good, just not as dynamic.

This is what I think of the wholesome standards.

I can't say their very offensive. But some aspects are questionable and distasteful to me. You haven't lost me as a reader and reviewer; but you are getting close.

I hope I didn't offend you. But this is what I honestly think. I am curious as to how things turn out. And I hope the problems with certain characters get cleared out eventually.

God bless.


Data Seeker

Dear Author

I have read chapter 1 up to chapter 3. Pretty good story plot thus far. The quality is good like the pervous fanfics.

The begining is a good begin for the story.

Yumi and Ulrich were done well. Its sad that Yumi said no, (can't say I'm surprised) but it makes sense. Suffering what she suffered is very scary. I wonder how things will turn out. Hope she gets better.

I have mixed feeling on how Jeremy and Aleta are done. Hope they wise up.

Sin has return; oh boy. Though Sword Hunter isn't as bad as she seems, she still needs to learn to be modest in her clothing. Hope she wises up.

Everyone else is handled well too.

This is what I think of the wholesome standards.

The langauge is passable. Good job.

As for situations; you were right, I didn't like what happen with Aleta and Jermemy. However, it was more distastful then offensive, and though I wish you would toned it down, I won't make a big deal about it like I have been making a big deal on 20/21. And some of the details are questionable; but you didn't cross a line (though it was close). Thanks.

The most violent thing was Yumi's nightmare. Though I dislike it, I won't make a big deal about it.


I hope this review has a good influence on you. I also hope to get a reply from you. God bless

Data Seeker

Nya^^ So cute, poor 'Lita...
Yumes!! I hope everything turns out ok w/ her and Ulrich...

Yummy chappie^^

-Gabs

Aw...I knew you were a big softie inside, Evil.

This chapter was awsome and surprised me..I liked the part with the ice cream lady karen had and her arm wrapped around alex lol.It was so romantic..I hope she don't get ice cream on him rofl.

Can't wait for the next one.

I liked the parts with aelita and shadow hunter..It was funny and something i enjoyed reading.The parts with odd and ulrich were hillurious..The chapter was good.

I liked the part with alex breaking the kiss.I also liked the comedy , teams and some characters.