Wow. It's so simple, yet the words are incredibly impacting. Great job!

Good description in such a short story but it could have been slightly longer! Good viewpoint too!

Great but short and you could've used quotation marks instead of brackets. Whose point of view is this anyway?

Not bad. not bad...

lol...said alot in a few sentences.

Billy much?
This said so much in so little words. Kudos.

dont rly get the (), but lyk it otherwise..