Really enjoyed this, hoping for more.

I'm very depressed that this isn't being continued... :( I think you should write more! It's wonderful!

Please continue this! It's really interesting!

Very interesting insight into Velma's childhood. I really enjoyed this a lot. Please updatre soon :)

Please update this story again. I always wondered what Velma's childhood was like.

Nice story! very interesting, keep going!

This is an excellent first chapter!

My question is, what are the rest of the chapters listed under?

I really want to read the rest.

BTW, I am a n0ob

wait, but isnt veronica velma's twin?

ah well... very good story :D

Sorry I didn't review every chapter. Just thought I'd read the whole thing and let you know what I thought of this one. I loved it! You've obviously got a very vivid imagination, and I'm hooked. I wanna read moree *Pouts* LOL.

Good job!

Hmm, good twist. I like your characterisation of Veronica and some of the historical references, like the sweatshop. You still have some modern references here and there, like the term WWI- World War I wasn't called that at the time, mainly because they didn't know there would be a World War II. I think by 1917 they had started calling it the Great War, but I'm not quite sure. That would be a more historically correct name, though. Never mind, it's a small detail.

It's interesting, and your portrayal of young Velma is one of the better ones I've seen. You still have quite a few modern expressions and references creeping through, though. It's not a huge deal, but it can be a bit distracting and having characters actually acting and speaking like they're from the time period gives your work more authenticity. A good option for learing early twentieth century slang is to read books or watch films set in that time period (you already have 'Chicago' as an example).

Your dialogue is very good, and your characterisation of Velma and Veronica as children is very cute. I like the way you imagined their family history. They didn't have tv back then, though- might want to keep an eye on that. Also bear in mind that America would probably be in the middle of WWI at this point. Though that would be very interesting to read. So yes, do keep going!