You. Have. Me. Laughing. Uncontrollably. LMAOOOO Okay...calming down now...calming down...okay. Breeeath. That was hilarious! 8DD I love their discussions and Sauron calling himself 'the great eye'. But...Melkoth IS THE BEST 8DDD I LOVE IT. (I didn't get the Morgor part (actually, it reminded me of Mordor and Morgul at the same time OTL) But I get it now! AWESOME 8D) Although, being a Feanor and Feanorion fangirl, I had to laugh at this:

"That detestable Maedhros and his endless bratty brothers would whine about plagiarism. I should have chained his head to the cliff."

-thinks about what Fingon did- ... -sniffle- That's mean, Melkoth! xDDDDDD -starts laughing uncontrollably again- Sauron is such a Melkoth's pet xDD Awesome.

Honestly, this is one of the funniest things I've ever read. And I can actually imagine this kind of thing happening, too! Very well done and very funny! :)

Araloth

I loved it. Not only is it well written and funny, but you show an extensive knowledge of the Silmarillion, of the elven language, and of the villains' names. Excellent!

Still Anonymous,

It has been a long time since I read fanfiction and I now that I am again, I got the urge to see what you have been up to. I do not know if you remember my reviews at all, but I adored all of you other stories. This one was simply brilliant. The dialogue was so sophisticated with a touch of evil menace lurking behind it (and drunkenness, I suppose). Their criticisms of Huan and Luthien made me tipsy with mirth. If I quoted my favorite parts, I would paste the whole story into here. Here is one anyway:

“You’re very evil right now,” Sauron hastened to reassure him.

Melkor shook his head sadly. “Thanks awfully. It’s quite proper of you, but really no good. I’m not evil enough, old chap."

Take care!

-Kitt

Wonderful! Why has no one reviewed this! It is terrific.

A nice ring to Sauron? Oh dear, I feel a dreadful pun sneaking up on me. Very clever, my friend.

"The next morning, Melkor woke up with a hangover." Si delightfully blunt, and dry, yet hilarious.

Write more!

TRS

Hey, dis be funny! (Sorry, too tired to review properly.)

“From henceforth,” he decreed, “I am Melkoth, the dark and evil lord of doom!”

There was a long silence.

“DOOM, I say!” Melkor bellowed. “Look scared, you maggots!”

It's even better with a context. It's hilarious. “DOOM, I say!”

From a technical point of view, I like the way the dialogue begins to gain momentum leading up to this declaration. The final sentence is perfect. The mere fact that Melkor, er, Melkoth said something so ridiculous and then forgot it raises the whole story to heights of even greater hilarity.

From the beginning, a few favorite parts:

Sauron 'brooding over his bucket of wine'. The image of Sauron with a bucket of wine is inherently funny. The more I think about it, the more amusing it is.

'"It really won’t do at all, old boy."' After reading this sentence, I could only imagine Melkor with a monocle and a mustache, and, of course, a British accent. With those few words, Morgoth's reputation of 'Respectable Villain' died a sad little death.

Sauron hastening to reassure Morgoth. Disturbingly, I think this is cute.

'“Never trust a girl,” Sauron advised. “They are always evil. Sure, they look cute and helpless, but as soon as they get you off your guard it’s ‘Give me your tower and get out of my sight, you miserable wretch.’”'

'“‘Sauron’ seems decent enough, but it doesn’t have a nice ring to it.”' Thus leading me to think of some dreadful puns, which I will leave to your imagination.

'"I remember when you smashed his lamps. I loved that!”

“Oh! Oh! Illuin! Ormal! Whatever shall I do?” Melkor said, pretending to be horrified.

The two dark lords tittered and shared a sneering moment.'

I tittered too. It seemed like just the sort of thing Melkor and Sauron would get around to talking about. And Melkor mimicking Aule's horror is simply evil... which is why it's perfect. 'A sneering moment', how sweet. Just what Melkor and Sauron would enjoy.

'"I should have chained his *head* to the cliff.”' The line that made me actually laugh out loud. Or snigger quietly. It was a highlight. Yes, my sense of humor is twisted.

I could copy and paste every sentence after that.

Thank you for writing such a delightful little humor fic, brilliant in so many ways. I really enjoyed it, and I want you to write more. WRITE MORE, I say.

RFLOL! Melkoth...sounds like a person speaking through his teeth or something. *giggle*

Well done!

-Calenlass