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Reviews For: Life Stories: The DC Missing Persons Unit - Reviews: Page 1 of 3

Unbridled.mind
2008-10-12
ch 21,
abuseInteresting.
Unbridled.mind
2008-10-09
ch 20,
abuseI've read the last few chapters quite a few times and I feel your fic has lost its edge. I don't know where it's going or what it's really about anymore. It may have to do with the start-stop narrative flow or some of the most interesting aspects e.g. Nathan as a character and the strange relationship he has with Jess, not being explored with enough depth to keep me, as a reader, engaged. I'm all for creative licence but keeping the characters' authenticity is a must, in any fandom.
BlindLoveFreeSpirit
2008-09-22
ch 20,
abuseHope she gets some h-e-l-p.
buddies
2008-09-17
ch 20,
abusegreat update
can't wait for more
BlindLoveFreeSpirit
2008-09-06
ch 19,
abuseThere's lot going on, which means a lot to look forward to next chapter. Update soon.
buddies
2008-09-06
ch 19,
abusegreat update
can't wait for more
buddies
2008-08-15
ch 18,
abusegreat update
can't wait for more
BlindLoveFreeSpirit
2008-08-15
ch 18,
abuseGood jod. There were some fillers, but good job nonetheless.
Unbridled.mind
2008-08-10
ch 18,
abuseI don't really know what to say. I suppose my only advice is be careful not to make your characters one note. Jess' eulogy was nice though.
BlindLoveFreeSpirit
2008-08-07
ch 17,
abuseWell that worked out nicely. Please update.
buddies
2008-08-03
ch 17,
abusegreat update
can't wait for more
Unbridled.mind
2008-08-03
ch 17,
abuseI'm glad you updated.
Unbridled.mind
2008-08-01
ch 16,
abuseI find that that when people write FF they tend to bring their personal ideologies onto the characters e.g. by domesticating Nicole or making Jess a victim. The emphasis on their domestic/personal lives is the crux of the story and for that I commend you, but there are times it feels like a slow burner because mundane things are described and conversations have fluff/filler in them. Sometimes it's better to describe what happens (in the background) rather than put it in a conversation as it can make your readers feel patronised and the story feel less fluid. Less words can make the same or even a more poignant effect. I hope you update soon.
buddies
2008-07-28
ch 15,
abusecan't wait for more
BlindLoveFreeSpirit
2008-07-28
ch 15,
abuseIt's coming along extremely well. I can't wait for more...I can't.
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