Reviews for TendoSaotome Psychic Research Center

Reviews For: TendoSaotome Psychic Research Center

Kitsune6 2007-12-17 ch 2,	abusePretty neat story. I'm interested to see where this is going. I do so love bitchy-Akane-drives-Ranma-to-Nabiki fics. More RxN fluff! Nice, professional writing. I'd say an 8 (check my profile), future creative plot might raise it to 8.5. Keep up the good work. =)
dennisud 2007-08-08 ch 2,	abuseSeems this Sakura's behind Nabiki's problems and she and Ramna are getting closer so... dennisud
Wonderbee31 2007-07-31 ch 2,	abuseNice part here, and looks like Akane is doing her best to drive Ranma away, and will be looking forward ot the blowup that seems to be on its way.
SonOfAWolf 2007-07-31 ch 2, anon.	abuseI noticed that you have a problem with using the proper there/their/they're in your story. Most of the time when you were using there, you should have been using their; and the one time you did use their, you should have used they're. Just thought that I would point this out so that I and others wouldn't flinch each time we saw a miss used version of there/their/they're. Other then that I think that this story has some good potential to be really good. Keep up the nice work. ~SonOfAWolf
Nysk 2007-07-30 ch 2,	abuseExcellent second chapter.. I like the way things are going.
foesjoe 2007-07-30 ch 2,	abuseI think your story could be interesting if you continue to portray how the relationship between Ranma and Nabiki changes slowly. On that note, I think it would have been better if you actually wrote out their **-fest at the end of the second chapter. It's just more entertaining to follow an active conversation instead of being told what happened. What would make your story even better would be proofreading on your part. You have several errors per paragraph or sentence and that makes it really bothersome to read you story. You seem to especially mix up there/they're/their and where/were. You mentioned something about a speech-to-text program you're using and I don't know if the errors stem from that. In any way you should probably sleep one night after finishing your chapter and then read it again the next day. I made the experience that it's harder to catch any errors directly after you've written something and sleeping on it really helps in that regard. There also many other errors aside from those and you should consider getting a prereader. All in all an interesting story. Looking forward to more
Innortal 2007-07-30 ch 2,	abuseNeed to work on names beginning with a capital letter, and sentence structure, but a nice read. Be careful, because most of Nabiki's funds went to herself. Soun does get paid for his city council job.
Windsbane 2007-07-30 ch 2,	abuseLooking good so far. I'm glad my ideas helped. I think you've done a good job explaining what goes on in Nabiki's mind besides money making schemes. I agree a good deal with some of the observations about Akane. Akane is spoiled in a way because she is never disciplined for her actions, specifically her violent ones when she is desperately in need of some form of punishment to remind her that what she does is simply wrong. She also seems to have it fairly easy around her home and could be relatively carefree if she let go of her anger. I've also noticed like you did that a large majority of Ranma's insults towards Akane are after she insults him first. I think so far you've done a very good job highlighting Akane in a negative way yet have not gone to the level that most people refer to as 'phscyo ** Akane'. I laughed when you gave her a D in chemistry, and agree her cooking problems probably would transfer over to chemistry experiments (mind you she could get a job if people wanted to make biological weapons). I never thought about Kasumi's position quite the way you've put it. Given her age she would have had a chance to move out of the house or at least try and find a job rather than become an automated maid. The completely calm and oblivious aspect of her personality actually did creep me out a few times in the anime and manga. I think Ranma being interested in philosiphy is an interesting idea, and one that makes some sense given how many martial arts seem to relate to philosiphies. This is also the first time I've ever seen somone describing how Ranma learned the hidden weapons technique, everyone always just skips to when he has learned it and never described the progress.
Kadunta 2007-07-30 ch 2,	abuseI like that you've had more than just one original take going on here. Even with(out) the future supernatural content, I'll be following this. Something else to complain about: punctuation, e.g., missing commas and full stops. Read through your text at least once before uploading it (or better yet, let someone who knows their stuff read it instead); most of these you probably could've corrected yourself, and also properly capitalized "Tofu" and written "bill" in lowercase.
Drkjester 2007-07-29 ch 2,	abuseI will tell you I couldn't finish reading your story. Speech needs different lines per talker. Having them all in paragraph makes the story difficult to read at best, a true headache at worst. I will watch for next posting, but if it isn't better formatting this will be the last I have read.
Nysk 2007-07-28 ch 1,	abuseVery interesting start. I hope you post again soon
Windsbane 2007-07-27 ch 1,	abuseYou've got a good start with a fairly original idea in this fic. This fic is different from others with Nabiki having problems becuase usually the problems start because Ranma decides to become indipendent, she regrets something she did, or she just plain gets in over her head. In this fic it's because of an associate who decided to branch off on their own and the results of the bets simply becoming too predictable. All and all its a good change from the standard plot ideas. I like the angle with Ranma simply getting tired of every little problem that always occurs. While it has been done before every author has their own twist to it. Personally I prefer the idea that Ranma is smarter than he seems, but ignorent about a fair amount of things due to the training trip and being alone with only Genma around. Most people seem to like going to the extremes where Ranma is either dumb as a brick, completely ignorent or a genius who was hiding it or didn't have the proper opportunity to learn or apply himself to things outside Martial Arts. It seems no one ever does try to learn a lot about Ranma's past or his personal preferences in the manga, anime or most fanfics even. Ranma's own personal admitance that he's somewhat antisocial is also a unique idea, rather than him wanting the situation to diffuse so he can act like he's friends with everyone again temporarily. It is a good insight into his own personal feelings and personality. I have a few ideas that might work for this fic. I think it would be interesting to have people see Ranma's report card or a progress report from school and find out he has an average in the 70% to mid 80% range (assuming that's what they use in Japanese High Schools as a marking system) just to prove that he's better in school and smarter than he appears. I think it would surprise a few people like Akane or Nabiki who likely assume him to be fairly bad in school. Genma probably wouldn't care too much so long as he didn't fail, Nodoka would proabably feel prideful that her son did so well, Kasumi would be like you said earlier with 'how wonderful' and Soun would probably be happy that his future son-in-law is doing well at school (possible waterworks scene, haha). Maybe have someone try to physically harm Nabiki because she tried to extort money from them or blackmail them. It might be an eye opener for her since she's not used to having people physically attack her as a possible retribuion for her actions. When she's in danger cue Ranma who gets the guy to back off just because of his protective nature. I could see Akane reacting to this situation similarly to how she initially took the time when her balcony collapsed and Ranma caught Nabiki to keep her from getting hurt but let Akane fall since she was less likely to be hurt by it during that arc where Nabiki temporarily was Ranma's fiance. This time it probably wouldn't result in changing the engagement just her feeling jealous of Ranma protecting her sister. It could also serve as a way to make Nabiki pay a bit more attention to Ranma's recent actions and behaviour patterns. Nabiki could tell Ranma the liklihood of the dojo going into debt due to the loss of the betting pools and split in her network. It would serve as a reason for them to talk for a while because they normally wouldn't have a reason to. If the fic starts progressing with Nabiki trying to learn a bit more about Ranma a good idea would be to have her try to find some information on his past. This could include a few things, like looking up old school records, his personal profile if she could get her hands on that information somehow, any old things Ranma may have been involved in like Martial Arts activities, training or tournaments, or interviewing some of the people who knew him before coming to Nerima, primarily Ukyo, Ryouga and Genma.
Wonderbee31 2007-07-27 ch 1,	abuseNice, and I like Ranma/Nabiki matches, so will be looking forward ot how you might get him out of Nerima, and what will happen afterwards.

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