Please write more as I am enjoying your story.

wow, a really good story, love how dramatic it is. looking forward to see what has happened

write more please!

...
That sucked and learn to write! >.

This is great!! Please, please, finish it!

wow keep it up HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU!!

Good!

What teh **? Against my better judgement, I kept reading. I'm wishing I didn't, because now I need to go wash my mind out by reading something -good-.

Bill's cursed, Deatheaters arrive, everyone's dead.

THAT'S what I mean when I said you need to concentrate on building suspense. There was no warning, no literary looming clouds on the horizon. You need to build these things up for your readers! Not just one line happy, the next, tragedy! It's very disconcerting to read, almost like jumping from one story to another without being warned. You don't want confused readers! On average, your audience will be bored teenagers who do not want to put a lot of effort into reading, certainly not to re-read things to work out what happened, they're more likely to just stop reading and find something else.

Ah well. I have no idea how much of this you're actually going to read. Feel free to delete the reviews if you so wish, I'm trying to help, but I'm in a snarky mood, so it's snarky-help!

*chokes* This is drivel. There is nothing believable at all about this story. I'm posting this anonymously because I can't be ** with a flame war, I just feel like informing you about my opinion.

They're all acting out of character, there is absolutely no build up to speak of, and it seems to be all over by chapter three. I can't bring myself to read more, since for all intents and purposes, it's finished for me. Have you heard of stringing things out? Creating a feeling of suspense? It will serve you well to do so!!

what? why is it sad? :(

I wanted to reveiw earlier, but it wasn't working. Now it is. I never thought Hermione would have the same style as me (I have two styles: Emo and Hippy. Mostly Hippy. Oh, but I don't go around snogging, boy after boy. I'm such a nerd, I haven't snoggeed anyone)!

I am happy Ron and Hermione ended up together though.

Wow O.O! Next Please XD Ill Be Watchin XD

update!
i likey very muchy

Hey, nice job!Can't wait to see what happens next.Very interesting take on Hermione/Ron!

RunForTheHills

Haha. cute end of the chapter. i like it.