"The blinding white light they were was now a burning orange." This sentence seems a little awkward, but otherwise, I enjoyed your descriptions.

Some conversation would be nice, that`s also a good thing to practice.

Personally I think it would be better to read if you were a bit less descriptive. Avoid devoting an entire paragraph to descriptions.

What the character thinks about the setting is actually a good way to portray scenery in most story point of views. Describing this from the omniscient perspective is generally a no-no, since it's the author intruding in the scene.

In this, I'm getting a sense that you're regurgitating descriptive phrases (often cliché) you've heard elsewhere. That is a problem.

Having people in a scene can help you describe it, because you can describe how they interact with the scenery. You could add more in that. (Very rough quick example: "Luke took a step towards his Master and slipped, landing on his hands in the thick mud that already covered his pants.")

You're also a mite overfond of ellipses… Not that I blame you. I'm rather fond of them, myself. ;)

I wouldn't say you "suck" at this. My impression from this is that you're still trying to figure out how YOU write, that you're still trying to write like someone else.

Read this aloud and edit it to sound natural to your ear, or describe the scene aloud, and write *that* down. Use that spoken bit as your foundation, and don't be afraid to use your imagination to come up with things to compare the scenery to. I think that'll help you.

Please note that I'm not saying you can only have one writing style. You might; you also might be able to vary your writing style enough to make it possible for people to not realize you're the same author. But you won't be able to know that until you figure out how to write yourself, if you take my meaning.

I hope this helps!

-Misti