I like the start... Hope you really could work this story out...

Wow, that was truly incredible. I may sound stupid saying this compared to other reviewers, but that chapter was alluring and fascinating. Usually I shy away from stories like that, but I was drawn to your story. It made me think, which is an accomplishment I assure you. But for what it's worth, you have talent, a lot of talent. You could definatley make it professionally in my opinion. Great job. =)

What a lovely story. But why was chapter two taken down? I'd love to read it, and I do hope you continue.

Constructive criticism (which may no longer be pertinent, considering the time this was written) would be that sometimes you over-describe, or there are so many different ideas going on in a sentence that the reader becomes confused. Maybe try shortening or simplifying some of them?

Keep writing!

Very creative and well written! You should update someday! :) I'm curious as to where this leads.

argh. i hate signing in to leave reviews...-_- this story is pure awesome. i'd totally forgotten that i read the first chapter and was captivated...that was quite a while ago now.

chapter 2 was fantastic. can't wait for an update. not even sure what pairings i'd be going for now...it's sad because subaru x akane is one of my favourite pairings...

i love your angst. please make lots of angst for shinogu and kazama XD

Wow... what a well written story... I can't wait for the next chapter!

Whoa. Slightly confusing, but I enjoyed it.