 Random Little Writer 2009-05-28 . chapter 1I must admit... Vosen's my favorite character. I can't help it, the man's too interesting for his own good. I like your characterization of him; he definitely gives off sore-loser vibes. I also like the addition of a sister, a mother, a former girlfriend, and an ex-wife. They add more to his character.
And I couldn't help but laugh at the part about Vosen beating up his girlfriend's 'friend'. XD |
 Speakfire 2007-08-25 . chapter 16I do not know how you do it. You have amazing writing skill, and a sense for picking out the best nuances that occur in both expression and word.
I have a request. I notice that you have somehow managed not to do a little essay on Irena Neski, the daughter of the Russian Ambassador that was Bourne's first real assignment. This would be the girl he apologizes to at the end of the 2nd move. Would love to see a write up on that, the longer the better! |
 Anton Ego 2007-08-25 . chapter 16I have to say, this is a wonderful set of shorts. It wraps everything up quite neatly, and although I usually hate fics written in present tense, this one does a wonderful job. You got the characterizations just right.
I'd love to see more. |
 critical smoke 2007-08-21 . chapter 16 Heys, I've got an idea: why don't u write an off shoot so we can see what David/Jason sent through when he went back to his home town?
Real good work on this story! |
 lazaefair 2007-08-20 . chapter 16Well, I'm out of ideas, and anyway this little bit just feels like the end to me. It's exactly what I can picture happening in a little movie epilogue, blond-haired David walking away from an ordinary suburban house, Pam standing next to a violated pot of petunias with a wry look on her face, and some cool techno beats starting up during the punchline. Those two interacted too much in the movies, as good enemies and better allies, not to get some kind of real closure.
The attempted assassination of Pam and Cronin makes so much sense. After all, if this universe's CIA can ruthlessly run multiple black ops programs, what would prevent them from trying to silence a whistle-blower? I like how your description of the attempted hit narrowed down to short sentences as things came to the brink, the way adrenaline must have narrowed Pam and Cronin's focus down to whatever was immediately at hand. And then the conversation with Bourne - I like how it was clipped and giving weight to the silences between words, evoking the same way the movies treated their 'quiet moments.'
Overall, a wonderful series. The beauty of fanfiction allows us to explore what the directors/editors can't because of time constraints or overbearing studios. Good luck, Jason - I hope you can find in Goa the peace you're looking for.
Re:
I do have about fourteen years of training in piano, but I slacked off majorly once I got in college. At this point I probably wouldn't make it past Beethoven on the Professor's scale. :) However, I did grow up around classical music thanks to my mother and I have loved it for a long time.
Also, to answer a question you asked a while ago, I haven't written any Bourne fic because I'm reasonably good at ideas, but horrible at carrying through the execution. I have a couple of bunnies running around, and one even has a few paragraphs written, but it's going to take a while before I can focus enough attention on them to go further. |
 Onora 2007-08-20 . chapter 16 Sorry, my last post got f*cked up a little. What I meant was you should hold more confidence about your story, because it is truly great. :) |
 Darlian 2007-08-19 . chapter 16“Where are you going now?”
“Goa,” he says. “I want to see Marie.”
All the puzzle pieces are back, but now the puzzle has to be put together.
Okay, so the laughter at the end might have been a little OOC, but everything else... Wow! The whole scene was playing perfectly in my head. And I was totally not expecting that welcome dose of action as well. :D
NOW I'm happy. Super elated. You rock! Whe! Jason and Pam down to a T - that's my LaFEB! |
 Onora 2007-08-19 . chapter 16 Oh, don't be so hard on yourself. It's a very good chapter. I know I enjoyed it. :D |
 Jelly 2007-08-17 . chapter 14 I like this a lot too, going back through the dead characters and seeing them through other eyes. What I think I like best is that each character is his own.
Very well done, and I do hope to read more! |
 lazaefair 2007-08-17 . chapter 14How do you pin these people down so neatly? Professor was the most human, Desh was the most asshole-y, Jarda was the most politely enigmatic, and yes, Castel was the most feral, and you pack so much character into each little ficlet.
One little quibble: "Papa would read her books about monsters and without a second’s pause he would be in his head"
Should it be "he would be in her head"? |
 lazaefair 2007-08-17 . chapter 13Can I squee? Let me squee for a minute. I don't know if you play piano, but I do, and the touch of detail with the composers' names and their respective difficulty levels was so gratifying. I also like how you reinforce his 'military' teaching style and emphasis on the metronome - it fleshes out a precise, meticulous personality, which I think can be inferred from his choice of a sniper's rifle for his main weapon as an assassin.
He also seemed like the most human of the Treadstone dogs in Identity, which gave the part about Natalie and Josef missing the Professor an extra edge. Bravo. |
 lazaefair 2007-08-17 . chapter 12Heh, Desh did act kind of like a douche the whole time on the screen, didn't he? Or rather, somewhat more of a douche than the others were. The bit about the monster-voice was inspired.
But even douches have family. I like how Rachid finds himself forced to acknowledge the humanity of Desh despite his low opinion of the man, especially since we movie viewers were not ever given the chance to see Desh in non-assassin mode. |
 lazaefair 2007-08-17 . chapter 11I am speechless. Did I expect all this when I made the suggestion? No. You are wonderful, wonderful person.
You packed a solid one-two punch into each of these. They're all brutally trained, deadly assassins, but they are so different on the surface, and no one knows how deep their individuality really goes, or maybe doesn't go.
I like the subtle foreign accent in this one - just a hint of of a cadence that is not the casual, drawling tones of an American. It fits in with the German setting. |
 Darlian 2007-08-17 . chapter 14"Someone killed him, this nice man who lived next door and shoveled her sidewalk when the winter came."
Well, what can I say? Lazaefare came up with a novel idea and like always, LaFEB's muse ran away with it. Brilliantly.
This Energetic Beaver is so energetic, she's electric. ZAP! Wow! Another batch of quality Bourne fic appears. Me happy now. |
 lazaefair 2007-08-15 . chapter 9I thought maybe you could do a chapter on the collective families of all the Treadstone/Blackbriar operatives that Bourne killed - they died faceless, storyless, bodies unmourned and unabsolved in exotic countries. Though if you ended this collection here, it's a good note to finish on, especially since the big theme of both books and movies was Bourne going home one way or another. |
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