That was brilliant! I immediately fell in love with this story. You're such a magnificent author. (Being an ambitious author myself, that's saying a lot.)

I adore "The Chronicles of Narnia", and I absolutely adore Tumnus, and this is definitely one of the best stories I've read concerning him! Excellent work!

Dear Petraverd:

First of all, let me say that this is one of the most beautiful themes I've ever seen on this site. Poignance, tenderness, theological profundity: in terms of potential, this story has it all. Indeed, I think it's the very perfection of the storyline that causes you some problems.

See, in order for this story to work, both Lucy and Tumnus have to be precisely in character. As you've written it, Tumnus is fine, but I have my doubts about Lucy. It's hard to pinpoint, but I'm having trouble identifying the unique voice of Narnia's child queen; for the most part, the queen seems to be eclipsing the child. It's as though you know what you want her to say so specifically that you're saying it for her.

I'll give you a minor example. In the penultimate sentence, you have Lucy say, "There is no need for words, Mr. Tumnus." I can't help feeling that the Lucy I know would have said, "It's all right, Mr. Tumnus. You don't need to say anything." Something to that effect, anyway.

So if you could go over this story again with that in mind, I'd really appreciate it. I desperately want to be able to add this to my Favorites list, and it depresses me severely to think that it's not quite ready yet.

Sincerely,
Qoheleth

Wonderful, Petra...just wonderful! Don't know why on earth I haven't read this before. So many great things...Tumnus' haunted memories, the sadness of never before experiencing the JOY of music, his loyalty to please others despite his own lack of enjoyment, Lucy's sweetness, gentle encouragement and spiritual wisdom (hm, reminds me of a certain daughter of mine...), and of course, his misgivings melting as his heart thaws in confession and worship through his playing. Wow. All of it. I haven't read all your things yet, Petra, and I've enjoyed all the works I have seen, but this one is my favorite hands down. Not just because of the power of music, but to witness the cleansing of a soul tormented with the memories of past sin was just beautiful. Well done!

Bravo! I really enjoyed this story. So many writers here seem to concentrate solely on Edmund's redemption and healing, and completely forget that poor Tumnus was in her employ for far longer. That kind of thing leaves a scar; the way you portrayed that in his complete loss of love for music was beautifully done.
Music truly is a wonderful thing, in worship or without, and the joy it brings can often heal better than words. I'm glad you gave our favourite faun the chance.
~MyBlueOblivion~

Oh Petra!! That was beautiful! Especially the last few paragraphs when Tumnus is playing for Aslan.
In your A/N you wrote: "Music is a very large part of my life, and nothing gives me a thrill like playing for Him." I feel the same way whenever I sit down to the piano or organ with a prayer in my heart. "Lord, help this music to be a joyful noise for you." There is no greater or more wonderful listener then Jesus. This story really reached into my heart and I was able to connect with Tumnus as he choose to play with his soul and not just his lips and fingers.

My gosh! It's SO IN CHARACTER!
(passes out)
And that's all I need to say. Well, that and that you maybe could check it over one last time. Other than that, it's AWESOME!

This is like such a short review for me! ^-^
-Fanficcer

Well done! I love how you wrote it and how you expressed the power of music. I have tried again and agian how to express the feeling of actually plaing the music, not the notes or rhythems but the music. Thank you so much!

Oh, Petraverd, how incredible! What a wonderful piece! I do believe that it has accomplished exactly what you wanted. As I read the beginning of the piece I saw it all laid out and it made perfect sense - Tumnus would have needed this encouragement, I'm sure of it.

I like how Lucy responds to Tumnus' remorse. "He saw Lucy’s mouth form a silent “Oh” as he trailed off." That was very Lucy. And I like how she talks him through his motivation for playing and then suggests such a powerful alternative in her simple, childlike way.

Sometimes I think it will be hard to translate a seemingly complex notion from our world into Narnia, but you did very well here with the concept of worship. And you showed that it (and here I mean worship, not the writing) really is much simpler and wonderfully freeing than it may at first seem. Thank you!

Oh, how beautiful! I really loved it, especially since I too am a musician, and I understood everything you meant when you were describing Tumnus' feelings while playing, especially when he played for Aslan. This was a very unique and touching idea, and I'm glad you did write it. Great job!

Luv,
Miss Pookamonga ;-P

What a great idea, to have Lucy suggest that Tumnus play for Aslan. The story seemed to me like variations on a theme (pun intended) of reconciliation—Tumnus to Lucy, Tumnus to Narnia, Tumnus to Aslan, and all of them back to him. What a wonderful way to use music! Music's tremendously important to me, though all I have as an instrument is my voice, so I was glad to see it used as such an important element here.

Bravo, as always. =D
I'm not a musician (...unless you count attempting to learn to play piano and trumpet and kindasorta failing), but a few of my friends love to play and sing, so I can kind of understand the feeling and everything. And Tumnus not wanting to play again at first makes sense, too. Hooray for Lucy. ^^ Good job. ^^

Woo-hoo! I got mentioned in the despatches!

Having been a musician, I also know the pleasure and joy of what it's like to get totally drawn into a piece of music and lose all sense of time and yourself. I can understand Tumnus' reluctance to play, too, because something so close and personal can't be forced if it's to have meaning. That said, it was a lovely story and Lucy, as always, was a delight.

Oh, this is definitely my favorite of your works so far. :)

I am also a musician, and I know that feeling when you're so far into the music that you connect with something bigger than yourself. It's definitely what makes music worthwhile, along with bringing that same experience to the listeners. I'm not even a big Mr. Tumnus fan but he was definitely a good vessel for this message. Nicely done! I love this one.