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| vampiric.princess 2008-07-22 ch 14, | abuseOh common!! That cannot be the enndd! You wonderful talented girl you get back on that horse and write more! |
| jennifier potter 2008-07-21 ch 7, | abusewerewolves in londo is sung by Warren Zevron |
| PocketFullOfSunshine 2008-07-19 ch 14, | abuseAw. That was sweet. Lovely. :) |
| The Clumsy Lamb 2008-07-14 ch 14, | abusei love it you are a very good writer and can not wait to see more |
| angel 2008-07-10 ch 14, anon. | abusehey this is so0o cool i hope u write more becasue you have a great talent |
| GEST 2008-07-07 ch 11, anon. | abusefor the love of god start updating again! |
| a fabricated truth 2008-06-28 ch 14, | abusemy goodness, i started this story today and just could not stop reading it! It is phenomenal! i cannot wait to read more! |
| Autumn Cullen. 2008-06-16 ch 14, | abuseAwh I loved it so much |
| hoobastank22 2008-06-12 ch 14, | abuseI loved your story! Please please please make a sequel! |
| mbliss 2008-06-08 ch 14, | abuseThis was a good story. I noticed at the beginning that you had written a note about spelling and your use of spell check. You wouldn't have been alerted to misspellings because in your mistakes you used other words. Example has instead of as that was a big one. I really like your story but I was a little confused about the jasper part. Was he lusting for Bella as a result of their emotions? Was he going to attack her, like rape or something? Anyway this was a good story. |
| mbliss 2008-06-05 ch 1, | abuseSo far I really like this, very good. thanks! |
| Miss Authorette 2008-06-04 ch 14, | abuseif you're going to end it this is a good place for it. but i wish you would continue writing only for my selfish desire though (haha i'm sounding like Edward), i loved your story and would love any future chapters! But if it's the end...GREAT STORY! i loved it! your writing is fantastic! |
| Twihardfan1234 2008-06-02 ch 7, | abuseokay, so again, I like your plot. However, your grammar still leaves something to be desired. I understand that you wrote these chapters already, I am just trying to catch your mistakes so you don't make them again in the future, because, in my opinion, they undermine your writing. 1. If you're using 'as' (ie. as tall as...), you keep writing "has," which is wrong. 2. It's "what am I supposed to DO?", not 'due'. 3. It's 'passed down' not 'pasted down'. 4. It's "too" as in "also." 5. "He LIES down," not LYES (that's not even a word.). Okay, that's it for now. I hope this helps, because I do think you could be a good writer. Ciao. |
| Twihardfan1234 2008-06-01 ch 3, | abuseI like your story. However, you have some serious editing errors in here I'm afraid. You have to watch your plurals (some things that end in y change to ies when their plural), your appostrophies (possessive is 's) and your conjunctive object pronouns (him and me, he and I, etc.). Also when you have a sentence in between quotes, there is punctuation before the second quote begins (e.g. "I will walk the dog," he said. "After I eat luch."). Be careful with your spelling too. This could be a really good story if you didn't let grammar in the way. Just trying to help. |
| musically challenged 2008-05-18 ch 14, | abusesweet story.. |