I can't believe Kylie told the 'head shot' joke. Guah. Hearing their backstory makes them look like Betty and Veronica in my head now, so it painted an interesting scene in my head.

Don't know if anyone voted on this yet, but I prefer longer chapters. But I would gladly accept one-scene chapters if you make each chapter free of spelling errors. Also, be warned that is gay when it comes to parsing documents. The top of this chapter says "Some" and nothing else before heading to the next paragraph. I can only guess it was supposed to be "Somewhere..." or something like that and cut it off.

Arcturus is The Man. He gets to look like Chuck Norris in my head until I see what these canon characters actually look like.

Kylie's easily distracted by clothes it seems. Bianca's got an alien baby in her stomach and Kylie's getting giddy over garters. And apparently Bianca can't mount a horse anymore and cries a lot. Bipolar emo. She must've skipped all the way to the third trimester overnight.

I think I like Kylie better than Bianca because she makes the canon characters laugh less. I like Marizia the best. I don't know very much about Oblivion, so I don't know anything about her except what I've seen here, but she sounds cool.

Also, poor Arcturus. Poor brandy on the wound; you'll be fine!

Your beta readers rely too heavily on Spellchecker and not enough on the context I think. The story and characters are developing nicely, so my biggest advice would be to watch the spelling and grammar.

Also, Arcturus and the brandy, lulz

Bianca and Kylie remind me of my sister and her amply gifted friend. So I believe they're real women. Thumbs up.

says I should be helpful, so I'll point out that you wrote "When she forced her eyes open her blurred vision caught [site] of Kylie..." Meanwhile I'll continue onward.

Aww so far its showing me that Martin and Bianca are probably going to be some sort of "item"
Right?
-Alayna

Oohh wow. I thought he was dead. XD and who is the baby if both the girls are there...crazy!
-Alayna

So far it's catchy. Sadly since I nver played the game im a little lost but i'll catch on.
-Alayna

Ha, I love that joke.

Lol, poor Bianca... Anyway, interesting fic, a few typos here and there but nothing mind-boggling.

This is a good story. You've got a very interesting plot going and I'd really like to see how it turns out. I like the internal conflict with Martin and his insecurity about his 'future' fate. It's a great segment of the Oblivion storyline.

Update soon, please.

And the plot thickens...

Uh, more like twelve alerts while I was playing Oblivion. I think I died twice form them, lol.

This sounds interesting, I enjoyed this chapter and it sounds like it could be an interesting read, I hope you continue!

I like your style and so far the plot is deeply intriguing. :) Do continue. :D