Awww pore Naruto :(

Hi!

It was more than okay! It was heartfelt and very sensitive. So you deserve praise for portraying his emotions so perfectly. Although I think it's too short. You know, maybe you could get a little bit more into detail? Anyway, I'm new to writing and i think you will be my role model for displaying the feelings of a character ;D

Hello

I just read your story and I wanted to say that I really enjoyed it. It was short, but you showed Naruto's emotions amazingly.

He is one of my favourite characters and in many stories, I feel he's completely OOC. He's someone who is strong and weak, who cries for love and recognition inside, but tries to smile outside. Naruto is someone who wants to find his place and he wants to be seen as more than a monster. He is so loud and cheerful because he feels alone. This is just my personal opinion...

Back to your story. So, I liked how you portrayed Naruto. Your grammar is good and there is nothing wrong with your writing style. You have a really good first story!

Only two points:

1. I do not own Naruto, you forgot the .

2. Maybe you should change your summary? Make it a bit more interesting? It's only a thought, maybe I'm wrong about that, but I feel the summary doesn't give your story justice.

I decided to read your other fanfiction, too, after reading Dark Emotion and I have to say, you are a good writer. Your fanfictions are short, but tell us something and you can describe the feelings of characters very well. I look forward to reading more from you!

Sephiel thinks you did great for your first try! She thinks that could be how Naruto feels...it's so sad, isn't it?

She hopes this won't stay your only fanfiction!

That's so sad, but most likely true! Very good! If I could rate, I'd rate it an 11 out of 10!