Real good! Is Mina going to be paired with Harry and Draco?

I must admit that I liked it, the introduction of a new main character to the HP universe is always intriguing. What has to be observed is the pace change from scene to scene, not too dissimilar from the books themselves, but done effectively in both. I would personally increase the length a little, and a bit more development in characters but other than that a well rounded inroduction.

Yes, this was exactly what I'd been talking about! Wow, you did so well, I'm actually bouncing in my seat, what an amazing chapter. I can totally sympathize with Mina and it was wonderful how you made some kind of kinship between her and Harry, because of where they come from, who they are, and that they realize it! It's beautiful and gives a kind of clarity and colour to the whole story that's brilliantly done.

I applaud you really, you've taken a suggestion and worked it with a flourish and you made the characters come alive and that tells me a lot about your skill as a writer. You've made me a mina-believer! I'm mentally patting you on the back, I had hopes for this tale, but you have exceeded all my expectations! I'll be looking forward to your next chapter, keep it up, you've done really well.

Yo, me again. Thank you for your reply on my review. You asked if nasally was a word, it is, but the subject in the sentence was voice. A nasally voice doesn't exist, a nasal voice does.
This third chapter is nice, it's very clear and I kind of like the soft side coming through with Draco in the end, he's a boy who's spoiled and annoying but probably has a really soft heart underneath.
The thing that I would most like to see in this story is Mina's background, the character doesn't have any real life to it yet. We can see that she's amazed by everything, that she hasn't had sweets before, but why is she so timid? Why hasn't she had sweets before? I don't mean to say that you have to write a chapter which tells us her entire life, but just throw some memories in the mix, when she shows an emotion like amazement at something she has never experienced before, then let her mull over in her head how it was before. Show us something of her inner world. You have invented a whole new character to the story, and now you have to make us believe it. I think you can do it, you have already improved in your writing in this chapter, so all you have to do now is pour some colour into your world.
Goodluck with the next chappie, Im very curious what you'll make of it

Hey, thought I'd leave a short note for you. The story in general is surprising, I'm curious as to what is going on exactly and I'm looking forward to seeing where this is going. There were a few grammar mistakes that could easily be solved I think like "nasally voice (nasal voice), and intimidating man, things like that.Just look it over again once more critically, or use one of those machines to find the faults, I don't know the name at the moment. It's one of the first things that people notice when they read, the typing errors. All in all, I rather liked the story. I'm looking forward to reading more