cool

I could actually imagine the characters saying that. However, the story is lacking in details and it's all jumbled up! Dx You should also make it longer. I really do look forward for the next chapter!

hehehe thats good !

Hello, I was reading your story. It is really good. To help you out I have some suggestion, I think you should have planned out your story abit more, its really interesting but it can be more better. The introduction and conclusion is descent it could be worked on more to improve. I saw some grammatical mistakes; I think you should have gotten someone to proof read it. Otherwise your story is looking good. Im looking forward to reading more from you.

Dogg in the house – Greendogg: This is a good and short story which is only a chapter of what’s left to come. Positive comments about this story are:
-Very descriptive with precise details such as what Will said right before he hung up the phone
-Good ending with the Cliffhanger because it excited the reader about what’s to come next and how that plan is going to be plotted out.

Ways that the author (Greendogg) can improve this piece of writing are:
-Should get this story edited to fix up spelling and/or grammar mistakes
-Not enough details provided about the characters and how they enter and leave the scene.
-There should also be more detail about the actions that are performed to enhance the experience of the reader

Looking good. Keep writing it!