Glad you updated!

A good chapter ... lots of drama and headbutting between the two of them over an issue that I don't think is really going to go away. You wrote the uncomfortable scenes really well.

One correction - it's Merril in the book with one L.

I like seeing a meaner side of Two-Bit too. I also like that Bonnie notices that no one thinks he has a problem because he's likable and funny when he's drunk. I think that's very true - the ones who are belligerent get picked out as having a problem way faster than those who aren't.

Wow, Great update ! The scene with Bonnie and Two-Bit was so powerful. I like how you have an outsider from seeing Two-Bit beyond being the joker and seeing him as someone with a problem. This is defentaly a different take on a a Two-Bit story. I hope you update soon.
PS- Did I mention soon.

This review may look a little familiar, lol - but I went back and edited my comments because I must have been really tired when I wrote them - they were a little confusing, lol.

Anyway, terrific chapter, I love the way it started out casually but then grew more and more complicated as Bonnie became aware of Two-Bit’s problem. And you handled that all really well and it felt very true to life. And I like that you didn’t make one of them absolutely right and one of them absolutely wrong. Her heart is in the right place, but sometimes abandoning a person isn’t the best you can do for them. I hope she realizes this and goes to see Marty (maybe in the next chapter?). Great job and I love the way you explored Two-Bit’s character and his motivation for being the way he is, the way he compares himself to everyone else and assumes being funny is all he has to offer. Terrific observations.

I vaguely remember reading the first chapter of this... How I got by this many chapters without coming across it again, I have no idea...

Anyway, I successfully avoided doing my paper on my interpretation of A Clockwork Orange, and I am not sad about it either. I might be a little tired in the morning, though, on a second thought.

BUT, I'm rambling, aren't I?

Awesome, AWESOME, awesome fic so far. Keep it up, you have a talent in my opinion. I'm sure others agree too. :)


-whatcoloristhesky

Great chapter; I love Steve and Two-Bit awkwardly talking all this over. I imagine Two-Bit hears a lot of people's problems, but doesn't have much in the way of ideas about helping them.

The way Bonnie's pulling away from her family and towards Two-Bit is interesting too. There's a lot of similarity in how Steve described Evie and how Bonnie is.

Yay! I missed this story so much. Bonnie is really not likeable here – she’s so stubborn, but it fits and I like that Two-Bit sees it too and that he’s not happy with it, either. I can't wait to see what happens when she finally realizes just how much Marty really needs her.

Poor Steve – but totally believable and really well done. I like Two-Bit dealt with something similar when he was with Kathy. And the end scene with Dale and Bonnie was terrific – I love their dialogue and I just like Bonnie’s POV and the way you write it.

Great update. I missed this story i'm glad it's not abandned . We need more Two-Bit stories out that show he's an actual person and not just a stand up comdian. I hope you update this soon.
PS-Did I mention soon?

Sorry I'm so late with this review (and it may sound a little familiar, lol):

Terrific chapter – every section was so strong in its own right. I love the confusion of the next morning with Bonnie and Two-Bit and the fact that you let them laugh together and eased the tension between them. The stuff with Ponyboy was terrific – I really loved their interaction and that Two-Bit is coming to terms with Dally and Johnny. It takes a long time to heal from something like that. And finally, I already told you how much I love Marty. And his POV is so well done and you’ve given some great insights into his character.

Bonnie is making me angry, but that totally fits with her character and makes her three dimensional and real, not just some perfect girl – she has flaws and she’s wrong sometimes.

Aw thats so sad! Bonnie get off your high horse and be there for your brother! Great story can't wait for the next chapter!! :)

Great update, I like the reltionship between Marty and Bonnie I think it's really sweet.Two-Bit and Boonie seem to be getting serious.I can't wait to see where you take this!Please update soon pretty please?

really good

I love the awkward morning scene lol. I also like that Two-Bit's not that eager to get rid of her come morning.

The scene with Pony was great ... I really can see Two-Bit kind of avoiding the Curtis place a little more than usual after Dally and Johnny die. I love that you've woven the book into the story, and I like that Pony wants Two-Bit to read it. So many stories that have Pony writing his theme have him hiding it, I like that he wants to show it, because at the end of the book, his whole reason for writing it is to share the story with others. Their back-and-forth teasing is really nice too ... I can see why Two-Bit would miss something like that.

The scene with Marty was good too. It's nice to get his feelings and take on things ... I can see him being very closed off and thinking he's invincible, but having this shred of conscience because he isn't a completely lost soul like Dally. I see him and Steve having a lot of similarities in that way - both close to going down the wrong path in life.

Sorry it took me so long to read this. I loved this chapter and it's length . Dale reminds me of Darry a bit and he's one of my favorite characters in this story.I'm glad Two-Bit didn't screw the realtionship up. I really do love those two.It's about time someone write a realtionship story with Two-Bit as the leading male he needs some loving to,lol.I hope you update soon pretty please?
PS- Did I mention SOON?

It was worth the wait :)

I love how complicated you're making this - everyone is reacting in ways that most authors wouldn't think of. I love that Two-Bit is getting nervous now that Bonnie's life is becoming so difficult. He can't solve her problems with a joke, so he doesn't know how to relate to her and that scares him.

And Bonnie is just as complicated. It IS Marty's fault he's in the situation he's in and you can really get a sense of her frustration with him and that she's at the breaking point and can't sensor herself in how she reacts to seeing him in the hospital. What she says is hateful and mean, but totally justified and you led the reader skillfully to that breaking point.

That whole family really needs to do some serious healing - not just physically, but emotionally too. And I'm so excited to see how you handle that. Oh, and I hope you write some more from Marty's POV and give some insight into what happened.

Great Job!

I really like what you're doing with the story. I like all the tension - between Two-Bit and himself, Two-Bit and Bonnie, Bonnie and her brothers.

I especially like all of Two-Bit's inner thoughts about Bonnie and not wanting to get too tangled up in someone with a lot of baggage. He doesn't seem to realize how many bags he's carrying lol. He shoves it all down so much, I think it becomes invisible to him. It's interesting to see a POV from a guy who is so unsure about a relationship and seems so desperate to keep it fun and light and not have anything serious happen upon it.