I like the direction that you are taking miss Parker and Jarod in this story update soon please?

I like the softer side of Lyle that you showed in this story...

i know it have been years since you last updated, but please give us a new chapter!

i want more, will you please write some more. I can't wait.

Oh my goodness!

I love this!

Aw now, you kiddies behave or I'll turn the hose on ya. Retract those claws, come on, there, that's better. When I read a story that doesn't just scream new york's best seller list, I either leave no comment or find something I like without pointing out any flaws. Heck, it's just a story. I say, oh, interesting plot blah blah and leave negativity to myself.

But yeah, I see the point. Lyle praying? Lyle good? Some authors have perfected the art of transforming Lyle but this? No. Agree, Miss P definitely is NOT a pez head, the characters are OC, even the sales person. Though jules has been unkind doesn't mean we all have to stoop to childish banter. Still, if you want fair treatment Jules, you may want to begin showing fairness to others, I mean hey come on, wwjd, what would Jarod do? He certainly wouldn't take a crap on someone's story.

...and since you deleted my review of chapter 1 , funny no one likes negative reviews, not me or the others you dissed and evidently, not you either, I decided to leave you another.

Chapter two is also overused in plot and completely out of character, poorly written, thrown together and did i mention un-original?

Miss Parker's items of self discovery laid out around her? Come on, she is not Jarod, not a pez head, she already knows about the book curious george. It just doesn't wash.

Yes you need a beta reader! This plot is worn out and over used like a beat up Buick in a chop shop. Aside from the grammatical errors which are appalling, it reads like the obituaries. Boring! I couldn't even finish. Graduate from high school and try again.

And of course you want reviews; nice little pats on the back, perhaps you want the same kind of reviews you left for me and thirteen other authors at another site who all decided to put our ideas in writing and keep a certain tv show alive. It's fiction you sad, sad individual. Fiction. And only a small minded person like yourself would insult someone for it. As you say, I make up my own rules for the piece I write. Nice way of trying to explain your own stupidity. or in your words "shame so deep even your parents and children feel it."

You left nothing but insults and poor ratings and not one kind word and yet you beg like a spoiled child for reviews.

Just thought I'd return the favor. You're welcome!

love. so where is the rest?

Nice, not too long. I like it :)

really great story hopefully it goes jmpr later

I hope this makes 6... KEEP going I really like it. It reelistic, esp. Sydney.

Hi

I just read your story it was good.

I like this a lot! I know it's been a while, but please update!

OK. Let's divide this, shall we?

Lyle's part, especially the bit about his family... very good

Miss Parker's part and her simulation on Jarod... very good also

Jarod's surprise... unforgetable.

Very nice and well thought up surprises and plots.

You did much better on this chapter than on the previous. i only wish the next one will be even better.