this was a great story.
i've read a lot of stories on fanfic but this is the first ive reviewed, please keep up writing them.
they fill up my time well, haha.

you potray the characters well, thank you
x

really good story.. please continue with this story or if it is finished I liked how Jack and Audrey and their daughter Jackie got together..

Chapter 2: You’re in your element when writing about the parent-child relationship… I loved Jack and Jackie’s (never understand why parents name kids after themselves, it’s just plain confusing) growing affection.

However, the scene with Kim was a little overdramatic and felt rushed. I think this scene would benefit from a longer development of their renewed relationship. And while I loved the whole shock-value approach to Kim meeting Jackie, Kim’s reaction- especially once alone again with her father- seemed a bit cheesy and over accepting given what we have previously seen of the Jack-Kim relationship.

I also felt that the scene with Bill did very little to further the story… he was just a very overqualified courier.

Chapter 3: I really liked the integrated flash-backs of Jack and Audrey’s experiences in the prison camp; they not only filled in some blanks but helped to grasp the challenges of returning to a normal life.

Given that Heller has a current restraining order for Jack, I thought his reaction to the whole interrupted embrace was a little ‘too much talk, not enough action’. If he really believed that Jack was taking advantage of his daughter, he wouldn’t just cast aspersions he’d either lay down the law or evict Jack.

Chapter 4: There were a couple of great scenes in this chapter, in particular the manipulative plotting of Jack as he had Jackie take Audrey her drink, and then of Jackie as she claimed the juiciest strawberry. I also liked the role reversal where Jackie got to look after her mother when she awoke from her nightmare- and what a nightmare at that!

The whole stuffed koala as a security blanket, and Audrey’s journey down the stairs to the beach, also made for some interesting psychoanalysis.

Overall, this was an enjoyable story… and happy endings- no matter how clique or predictable- are always welcome, especially when they are well-written.

Natalie

Poor Jack, he never seems to get a break... almost makes you believe in karma!

Personally, I with Senator Heller, no matter how much Jack loves his family, its hard to believe that he truly has the ability to put them and their needs above protecting the country. However, I still hoping that Heller gives him a chance to try.

Chloe is always great value in a story... she can get her hands on any intel. ASAP and is good for a couple of hilariously candid comments.

Natalie

Just stopping by to let you know how much I enjoyed your fic!! Brilliantly written. I have to say - I've always had a thought about how I'd write a post-S6 fic, and this is exactly how I imagined it, only I gave Jack and Audrey a son, instead of a daughter!

Thanks again,

Bubble Sheep

I have a test to study for and your keeping me reading with all these...I should really stop and wait till 2 weeks later. But this story was great. You will get no argument from me regarding this is how Jack and Audrey's story should end. I can' believe him having to say goodbye to Audrey like that in the real S6 ending and Heller treating them that way. I hope I get a chance to post more stories...one also involves Audrey fathering Jack's kids.

Hi there,

Very nice story. I liked the daughter angle. It would be terrific for Jack to have a second chance at raising a child with a woman he loves.

SB

Yay a happy ending! This made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Jackie was too cute. Her not so subtle method of getting the strawberry was adorable and, more importantly, effective. Thanks for giving Jack and Audrey some peace and happiness, especially since they notably got neither last season. With the wait for S7 getting longer each day, I’d like to imagine that they have gotten their lives back together as you have written. Enjoy your break, and I hope your muse doesn’t stay away for too long!

My only criticism of this story is that I don't think Audrey would have just woken up and been better. Still, you did a great job with this story and I really enjoyed it :D

Oh wow, MAJOR CUTENESS OVERLOAD! I LOVE this! Ah, you write so well! :)

yes, i really enjoyed this story. well written & believable.well done! :-)

Wow, great job with this story! I'm not a 24 fan but I caught a few episodes of season 6 a while back and Jack/Audrey just kind of grew on me...
You really came through with this story and described beautifully what could -and should- have happened at the end of Day 6. It is, after all, plausible that Jac would be most suited to deal with Audrey after this ordeal since they both went through the same thing. Therapists may be good, but odds are they don't really know what people have gone through...

Excellent work! You should definitely keep writing 'cause you're really good at this! Kudos.

The reunion--finally! Very sweet and touching, but still realistic. (“I’m just so afraid that she won’t remember me and won’t love me.”)

For a huge Jack and Audrey fan like me, this story is absolutely incredible!!

Thank you forgiving me the happy Jack and Audrey ending, I don't think I will get from the show!!

Wow amazing! I really liked how Jacqueline got used to Audrey being 'back', as she did with Jack. This story was really cute. I'm glad Jim finally understood how much Jack cared for Audrey and how much she really needed him. Beautiful story! Loved all four chapters of it.
Can't wait for another story of yours.

twentyfour.mad ~Mak