try and find me and give me a few tips to make the story

I love that story because it is a different kind of jak and daxter story let me know if you come up with a jak and daxter vs.ratchet and clank vs.the cooper gang

I love it more please

Aww...Such a cute chapter, but a bit twisted, what with Jak pretending to be a convict! Daxter was right not trust him! (Nods approvingly) Praxis's and Jak's plan was very well thought-out. Did you spend time thinking what they were going to do? If so, I applaud you. (Claps enthustiastically) The makeout between Jak and Keira was rather short, but unexpected. As for Jak's arrival in the garage, that was a bit quick and sudden. You could have drawn it out more, kept Keira and Daxter alone for a while. It would have been nice to hear their iner thoughts on the situation, no offense. Ah, well. Still, Jak is quite an actor! The info on the Dark Warrior Program was suprising. Never knew Jak and Praxis would go that far in giving away details of their plan. The part on Commander Torn not being dead and joining the Resistance was nice, not to mention useful for the Baron, as was the ending conversation about Daxter and Tess's relationship. Overall, an entertaining chapter, nicely written. Update soon, okay?

P.S: Er, I know this may seem entirely random, as it sin't about your work, but I must ask: Do you have any suggestions on names for a secret organization that specializes in thievery, spying/gathering information, assasinations, and capturing/killing escaped prisoners? I plan on writing a series about it, but I've been stuck on what to call them. If you have any, I'd be really grateful! ^_^ Bye!

I don't know wether to congradulate you for your creativness on this story, or start pulling out my weapons and charging at you for making Jak a traitor...
Is he going to die in the end? I think that would be poetic, redemption through death and self-sacrifice.

OMG! Jak's lying to them all! Stupid jackass Baron! He tricked him! Let's hope it doesnt get any worse. This story just keeps getting better! Keep it up! I can't wait to see what happens next.

Cute, cute, cute! I love Daxter's little comments, especially when he walked in on Jak and Keira, I laughed out loud and my mom looked at me like I was a looney tune, haha. Can't wait for some more!

Yayness. I've been waiting for another chapter for this story for awhile. I wonder how Praxis' 'little' plan is going to work out. Cause we all know that Jak can't lie forever, unless he get's some major payback from the Baron, but I suppose having Keira be safe is good enough huh? Well I guess it would suppose on wether or not Jak and Keira don't get into a fight, cause Jak could say some things and then Keira would tell someone, probably Torn and things could go from bad to worse than worse.

Come on Jak, can't you see how much of a jerk off Praxis is?!? Curses, he'll come out...but I can't wait until I read it for sure...I hope

It was a little wonky on the constant position switching...and yet fun and done masterfully so that you could tell they want to be together despite it all. Must finish the rest now

Wootsauce for Jak/Keira!

Ooh...This is getting interesting! I liked the part where Keira was trying not to think about the sex she and Jak just had. So amusing, especially when she mentally slapped herself! XD Daxter's arrival was suprising. Thought someone else would come instead, although who is one to go to the girl's house besides Jak? After all, the story is entered around them...Not that I mind. But I would like it if you'd expand the story a bit more and add a few more canon characters into the mix. Don't really want the series to turn into a love-fest, no offense. Or are you going to do that in the next chapter? If so, then I hope to see it up soon. The fact that the little rodent could smell lust since he's a Ottsel was a bit strange, but I guess all animals are like that, eh? They can smell emotions? The part where Daxter said that Jak could easily sleep with someone he doesn't love as with someone he does love was pretty smart of him. Not suprising, since he does have a girlfriend and is obsessed with ladies! XD

I can't believe Baron Praxis found out about Keira! Isn't true love supposed to be PRIVATE?! Of course Errol told him...Little snitch...(Glares and shakes fist at the Commander). The fact that Jak willing to pry information out of his own lover was noble, in my opinion. Must be extremely hard to do that to normal person, much more to someone you care about. What a ruthless man the Baron is...No wonder everyone hates him! :D Hm...wonder how the Freedom League will react once they find out Jak is "on the run" from Praxis? And what will their thoughts be when they find out that it was a trick? Plus, will Keira ever trust him again after what he's done to her? Guess I'll find out in the next chapter! Please update soon!

P.S: Before I forget, I have one more question to ask of you. Its is kind of opinion-based, and I must be stupid to put it up in a public review, but I'll do so anyways! Okay, here I go: You love JakxKeira, right? And you've played Jak 2: Renegade, correct? So, my question is, why do you still like JakxKeira, even though you know how Keira treated Jak throughout the whole game? I mean, she kind of treated him like dirt, with her stinging comments about his transformations and Dark Eco powers. And she loved ERROL, the same man who tormented Jak while he was in prison. Oh, and in case you're wondering, I'm asking you this because...well, its a LONG story. If you want to know of it, I'll send you a PM. However, please try to answer honestly! I really want to know you're thoughts on this topic! (And if you want to know where I stand in this debate, its both. Yes, I like JakxKeira and Anti-JakxKeira. Strange, I know...)

You? Disappoint? Never! hah, This will be interesting to see how it unfolds...try not to be too evil to poor Jak, ;)

Alright. The heat is on baby. Now come the very unpleasant events. You're in for it now Jak!

I've read the two chapters you've posted, but again am too lazy to submit a review for each. So I'm going to pack all of my thoughts into this one (again).

Lovely story so far! The beginning of Chapter Eight was great, so calm and peaceful. Both Keira and Jak seemed to have warmed to each other now and are truly enjoying each other's company. How cute! Although you ruined the moment a bit when Jak mentioned how he got injured in the first place...Keira's reaction sounded very natural of her. The line where she told Jak that she understood, to kill whenever neccesary and rescue the innocent if possible, that only then she would be proud of him...was awesome! She sounded a bit like his mother when she said that, but that's just my opinion, me being the weak, sappy person that I am. :p Errol's interregation to the Hero was good, as it sounds just like the thing he'd do if someone were late or missing. Him knowing of Jak's lover and stalking him was a suprise, but fitted nicely into the story. Over all, the chapter was short, but sweet. I enjoyed reading immensely.

Onto Chapter Nine...While it was full of lemon, it was pretty good. Errol's reaction to Keira being a rebel was a bit suprising. And what she said to Jak after he accused her of him passing the info onto the Baron was kind of wise. Plus, it sounded like Romeo and Juliet! XD The sex scene was amusing. I never knew intercourse would hurt. Probably because I've never experienced it before XP The rest went smoothly, though I'm a bit disappointed it was so short. I like the description in your sex scenes, they're so engaging...I wonder how Errol would react if he saw Keira and Jak having sex...He'd probably freak out. (Smirks) Him tattling to the Baron about thier relationship was a bit childish, in my opinion. I mean, he could of taken care of the problem himself. Why drag Praxis into it? The ending was great. It flowed wonderfully and tied very deeply into the plot. I long to know what happens next. Plase update soon!

I don't feel like signing in, but it's me, trust me, if I wasn't me then I wouldn't have an identity! Ah!! Anyways, lovee the fluff!! I absolutely loove the fluff, I love fluff. Anyways, good work on the black-mail. We always gotta love black-mail, especially when it comes to Jak. He has so much black-mail after the second game it isn't even funny. Okay yes it is! But that is what makes writing black-mail stories on him so much fun! I, once again, *sing song voice* love Fluff! Good story, once again, but I really want another chapter! Not demanding, just, ya know.