Very interesting take - it certainly seems likely that a tech-priest in Rasvaal's situation would be fooled into thinking the Thousand Sons were machine-spirits. I suppose in a sense it really isn't far from the truth. Good work as always.

I am Jack's sense of awe. This is great! The 40k novels aren't this good!

An excellent idea, and solid style. I think you captured the brusqueness of, but also the tiny morsel of respect a Thousand Sons Marine would have for someone like Rasvaal quite well. It's also a portrayal of Chaos that I love reading about.

It's short, so whatever flaws there might be aren't overly obvious. Good job with that. I sort of wish it would continue into a full story, but I can understand if it doesn't happen.