Reviews for What Would Happen If

Reviews For: What Would Happen If - Reviews: Page 1 of 2

crzy4anime 2008-07-25 ch 15,	abusevery interesting ending. i do feel it might have been rushed a little but that's okay. i love your ending author note. very sweet ending. until next time. ~_~Suchi~_~
crzy4anime 2008-07-15 ch 14,	abusewow! you really keep surprising me with how you take suggestions and make them completely your own. i totally wasn't expecting jules to beat the crap out of joe but that was great. ^^ you've definitely kept me guessing even when i'm the one giving out the ideas. you're a great writer and i can't wait to see what you pop up with next. keep up the great work. ~_~Suchi~_~
crzy4anime 2008-07-10 ch 13,	abuseyour story is dangerous to my health. every time i see something i suggested or you make a comment about me helping i freak out and smack my knee in to my computer desk. ^^; it's so cool to actually have helped someone out. i think the chapter was a little rushed but that is understandable. also jules' reaction to everything was a little weird until i thought about her being in shock so i think next time maybe she should break down some because she was raped- maybe worry she's too dirty now or soiled, or maybe overcompensate and become defensive about things and guarded. her talk with her dad should be interesting- i think he should see something is wrong and question her. then you have to decide if jules should crack and tell him or just ask to be left alone. i do think joe should be punished for what he did one way or another and if jules isn't calling the police then karma should bite him majorly in the **. >< i don't think even her not going to the police would keep joe away from her cause he would be paranoid about her telling which could lead to him trying to kill her and she defends herself or something. an interesting chapter and i can't wait to see what comes next. oh and hitting joe on the head with a lamp definitely had me jumping and whacking my knee. ^^ until next time. ~_~Suchi~_~
crzy4anime 2008-07-01 ch 12,	abusei love it! great update and i'm glad jess decided to go get her girl immediately and jules' dad being cool with it was great- they are definitely going to need some help. i love how you change to their full names when parents talk- it's interesting. now on to suggestions: it just depends on how far you want to go- does he rough her up, try to rape/kill her, does he begin to torture her only for jess to come and if so how does jess save jules (cause she has to ^^ i think it would be interesting to have a jess in shining armo... er shin guards) then if he just roughs her up how does jess intervene- is the door open and she walks in to the house and then his room and shove him out a window or clock him with something heavy. also if he tries to rape jules how far does it go, does jess see and think that jules is actually willingly participating (not what i want but hey if you want angst *shrugs) or does she brain joe with a lamp. do you kill joe off, put him in a coma/jail, etc. well there's a lot of ideas for you ^^ keep up the great work and i can't wait for the next chapter with hopefully some of my ideas scattered around. XD until next time. ~_~Suchi~_~ oh and hopefully if anything happens and jess gets caught too jules' dad knows were they are and could help when they don't come back before a certain time- cool another idea, man i just keep spitting them out, it's gotta be your great story plot. ^^
crzy4anime 2008-07-01 ch 11,	abusewow. for a second at the beginning i thought jess and tony might find the pictures because they were at a park like joe and jules but i like what you did. when i commented that joe should get upset with jules i wasn't expecting full stalker mode but that was a great twist. really interesting and i can't wait to find out how jules gets out of this and what jess is going to do. keep up the great work. ~_~Suchi~_~
Rogue Experiment 2008-06-30 ch 10,	abuseThis story is good overall but the spelling could use some work and you have written some things in American (e.g. sweater, backyard). I think the writing could use a little improvement to help it flow better in some parts though, however, you have improved slightly in each chapter and I'm guessing that with time you will probably get even better. The plot is good and I like the fact it's not just a one-shot. The length of your story is nice and it's good enough to keep the reader interested as it continues, well done! I hope that things turn out well for Jules and Jess in the end, that they will find a way to be together/their parents will understand and hopefully stabs Joes with spork Joe will get punished for being such a jerk. Can't wait for the next chapter!! Great!
holybell 2008-06-28 ch 10,	abusewhoohoo! whole 3 new chapters for me to read. joe is such a bad guy ,he should just leave jules alone >_> but it's not gonna be like he wants it. jess surely will chose jules over him any time. and toni who is like a secret agent between the two of them nice :D hopefully there will be some more conversation between our two favourite female soccer players. it's time they make up and be happy. i love happy endings x) anywho, you've been doing a grat job to write the newer chapters, and so fast, too! I'm impressed! keep up the grat work and maybe throw in a little more lovey-dovey... just a suggestion :P
crzy4anime 2008-06-25 ch 10,	abusewoot. another chapter and so filled with emotion. i don't know were you are going with this which is really great. i kind of hope that jules will talk to her dad about what's going on or at least someone else. love how you incorporated my thoughts on things, it's completely awesome. keep up the great work and i can't wait for more. ~_~Suchi~_~
crzy4anime 2008-06-25 ch 9,	abusewoot! i'm so ecstatic, you took my advice. ^^ that makes me really happy. i love how you incorporated the ideas in to the story i didn't really think of how to put them in. i can't wait to see what happens with joe. i love how you had jess pop up 5 mins after jules left i did not think that was going to happen. great update and jules almost talk with her father was really endearing. keep up the great work. eagerly awaiting the next update. ~_~Suchi~_~ ps: if you need any more help just contact me, i'm more than willing. XD
crzy4anime 2008-06-19 ch 8,	abuseinteresting new chapter. great dynamics with emotions flying everywhere. kind of a hard thing to go off of. what would happen if... maybe if you show what has been going on with Jess for a while like if she's deciding that she made a mistake calling it off with Jules. knowing how jess feels might help with the dynamics between jules and joe. i don't think jules should help joe and maybe joe should be a little meaner especially if she turns him down. if jess is questioning her decision then maybe she should have a confrontation with pinky, you could also bring in jess' guy friend who i believe came out as gay to jess in the movie-it's been a while since i've seen the movie. i might have some other ideas so if you want to contact me you can at . either way nice update and looking forward to more. ~_~Suchi~_~
holybell 2008-06-14 ch 1,	abuseyoust foind this amazing story! i like it very much, really realistic! ,it's not like happily and dreamlike without prblems like other stories but really exciting and sometimes even scary >__> now i really wanna know how it goes on. and jess has to do some serious apologies now that she did not say that she really loved jules. she does love her, so she should stay true to her feelings. and i begin to dislike joe even less, he's gonna be a real problem in the future. but someone has to be the bad guy! not that he's gonna comfort jules and he "accidentaly" kisses her when jess is nearby. that would be really serious... anyway, great story so far, can't wait for another chapter
crzy4anime 2008-06-03 ch 7,	abuseoh boy. a lot of angst and confusion. no idea how this is going to be resolved. keep up the great work. ~_~Suchi~_~
crzy4anime 2008-06-02 ch 6,	abusewow... a really charged chapter full of emotion. completely happy that you updated. ^^ love the story and wish more people would write about this pairing. i have no idea were you are going with this (which is a good thing XP) so i am eagerly awaiting the next update. keep up the great work. ~_~Suchi~_~
dasolution 2008-01-21 ch 5,	abuseOh god, another wet dream of Bend It Like Beckham. Of course I posted my own BILB fan fict here ( and that I see that the story is not complete, let me put the finishing touches to it: Title: What Would Happen If... I Found Those Two Tiny Twats Fingering Each Other Chapter 6: I see a bad moon horizon. While Pinky was in the car I knocked on the window. "Hey it's you, what's up." "I see that you found out about Jess and Jules lezbo lovin'." "Yes, my parents would have a serious fit about it." "Look Pinky, don't tell them anything because they don't need the extra stress in their lives. I'll take care of those two." "You will?" "Trust me, I know how to take care of those type of situations veru well." I said with a grin, followed with a wink. "Thank you so much." "No problem Pinky, just go home and relax, everything will be fine." So Pinky drove off back to her home, it was night time and no one else was around the beach, a perfect time to straighten the situation out. While those two Sappho were looking up at the skies and cutely cuddling each other (), I walked right up to them and my head covered their view. "It may not be a full moon tonight, but it's a bad mood horizon for you two Fanny Fluffers (fanny = in England)." They both screamed loudly and then Jules said "Oh bloody God it's him!" They tried to get away but I quickly grabbed both of them by their throats and picked them up. "Do you think you two dirty dykes can get away from me? HUH?!" They were shaken in fear as I was still holding them by their necks. So I slam both of their heads together and they were in pain but they were still conscious. I then punch Jules dead in the face and slap Ghandi Girl like she was a cheap ho from Mumbai. Then I quickly grabbed them and brought them to the water. "Since you two like salty things, you shouldn't have a problem when you take this plunge..." I slammed their faces in the salty ocean water and did this a few more times, they were by now screaming and crying, but why are they complaining? I mean the water couldn't be any saltier than their . Then after that I told Jess something. "You know your friend Toni?" Jess had a puzzled look on her first, then it finally hit her and her eyes grew in shock. "What the did you do to Toni? Don't tell me you.." "I sure did Tandoori , I went into his home, found him playing with himself while looking at a poster of David Beckham. So I grabbed him and tied him up, torturing that batty boy. Then I poured gasoline on him and lit that faggy boy up like a fireplace. One roasted ." She was crying while I was laughing. I didn't give a that she was sad. So I grabbed those two Whores and brought them to a boat, tied them up and travelled far enough to be away from the English border limit. I stopped the boat and told them "Now since you two Tuna Munchers like to eat fish, it's only fitting that you join them." So I threw those two Clam Diggers to the sea and they eventually drowned. I went back to the land and sat on the beach for the rest of the night, it feels good getting rid of deviants that don't belong here. THE END.
caitsie 2008-01-06 ch 1,	abuseDo you remember when Tony told Jess he was gay... the first thing she said was "...but you're Indian".Obviously people can't control their true feelings for people, but this movie was strongly built around beliefs. It was one thing to have Jess already with Jo (an Irish guy) but making her and Jules a pair is kind of pushing it. This is only my opinion however, other people seem to be enjoying it so don't stop writing because of my comment, we all have our own tastes. Good Luck! =)

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