|Reviews for Reasoning|
| Writer Awakened 12/15/07 . chapter 1
Quite nice. Any Sain-fic in general is instantly interesting, although few people seem to get his personality exactly correct. I thought the premise of the story was interesting and Fiora seems mainly in character; the only thing I have an issue with is Sain's characterization here.
Admittedly, the way I see Sain is probably a bit different than most people- I don't think he's completely this carefree admirer of women, nor do I think he's hiding a secret well of angst, but above all, Sain struck me as being someone who enjoys the company of women but is morbidly afraid of commitment. Specifically, the part where Sain launches into his explanation of exactly why he is the way he is seems somewhat OOC, considering that, from what I've seen of his supports, whenever he's taken seriously or confronted about his flirting he doesn't seem to have an answer- almost as if he doesn't expect anyone to take him seriously! XD I think Sain has a lot of legitimate reasons for why he is how he is, but it just seemed a little forced in this fic.
Despite that, I did like the story; Fiora indulging Sain in his request for another date at the end was particularly kind and a nice touch, I thought. Good job! Keep writing :D
| Fan Fan Girl 12/10/07 . chapter 1
Now THIS is what I mean by cohesion and leaving out unimportant details. Everything in this piece fit perfectly, in my opinion. Very smooth and enjoyable. _ And I love the little details that you DID add, like Fiora "taking only a sip of the drink in front of her before putting her hands back where they had previously been." It brings our attention to Fiora's obvious displays of discomfort, especially the bit where she keeps her hands fidgeting in her lap. And I think you explored a great dynamic of their relationship... I just melted when Sain got all quiet and was like "I compliment women because they might need it." Okay, he is a TRUE knight in shining armor! My gosh! How sensitive!
I like how Fiora was a little unbelieving at first, but now we're getting into criticism territory. I say at first because after they went outside, she just kind accepted Sain. It seemed a little... sudden? Rushed? I think that someone like Fiora would wait to see if he actually stopped flirting with the other women before she tacked her hopes on another date with him. So I didn't like the decision to end it there... but I like the concept of this story. It was well-written and the dialogue was fabulous!
Very, very good work on this one. :3 It was a pleasure to read. Keep it up!
| IceBlade28 12/5/07 . chapter 1
Hey Manna! Wow, you're really turning out fics here! This was a cute little piece, a little predictable, and I was proud of you for not taking Sain down into a more 'vulnerable' or 'hurt' emotional state- he wouldn't let a lady see how much her words could hurt when they were on a date together. The dynamics here were nicely handled, and I look forward to your next work!
| Sara Jaye 12/5/07 . chapter 1
Aww, this was cute! And I liked Sain's partial explanation for his flirting, too.
| Edward Houshi 12/4/07 . chapter 1
I liked it. It's really cheerful, and extremely cute, but a little disjointed. That could be that I've been up to long, but it doesn't seem like it was paced right.
Anyways, it's still really nice.
| Maxmagnus20019 12/4/07 . chapter 1
I liked it, I like the way the Sain goes like O_o when she tells him no woman feels special when he compliments them.
Everything seemed in-character, seriously.
A good, fluffy and slightly humourous story, good job!
| Cipher Admin Eevee 12/4/07 . chapter 1
Somehow, the ending reminds me of the Rebecca/Sain support conversation. And yes- IMO, you got the both characters down very well, perfectly done formal dialogue Fiora-style. :)
One thing, though- 'He bit back any silly banter that he might have used with any of the other women- women who would most likely understand that he was joking' seems a little contradictory, considering that his intentions for flirting are, at least, mildly serious. Also, it somehow seems like a POV slip to m, since the rest of the story seems to be told from Fiora's perspective...
Beautiful, mildly fluffy Sain/Fiora relationship. Wonderfully done. :)
| Kitsilver 12/4/07 . chapter 1
I like it.
The tone was light, and even at 2,0 words, still short and to the point. I like the little actions the characters made as they talked, helping me see the scene. Like Fiora playing with her mug, Sain putting his hand on the back of his neck and looking sheepish, then Fiora leaning into Sain just a little bit on the way home.
Fiora felt pretty natural and I think she responded to Sain in a believable way. Sain too was pretty well done. His last bit of dialogue isn't as good, and for some reason him saying "Sweet little Florina" rubs me wrong, but for the most part it sounds like him. Even the part where he explains why he flirts, which could have come off a lot more stiff and awkward than it did. I also laughed when he says "No, I'm not a lecherous old man, let me finish!" so that was prolly my fave part of the piece.
Good stuff Manna. It's hard for me to see romance between the two, but friendship and a bit of flirting I can totally see between Sain and Fiora. (heh, almost wrote Florina...You can tell where my mind is, no?)
| wolfraven80 12/4/07 . chapter 1
I’d love to be able to help you with characterisation but alas! I’m afraid I don’t know enough about Fiora to be able to comment much. I do remember Sain of course, tough, and I thought your take on him here was really interesting. He’s at once thoughtful and thoughtless, innocent in his own way, slightly conniving way. ;)
There were a few small typos but nothing major. Like I said, I can’t say whether Fiora was in character or not, but I do think she was well-written. The way she moves from irritation to fondness happened very smoothly; it didn’t feel rushed or forced.
I do have a slight quibble about the phrase "asking me out again" or "go out again." It might be just me, mind you, but I find the phrase sounds too modern to be used in most fantasy fiction. Courting, which you used earlier, made perfect sense, but because people didn’t date in the way we think of it the phrase "asking out [on a date]" doesn’t sit well with me and I think there are other more general turns of phrase that could be easily substituted. But yeah, take this with a grain of salt since I’m notoriously picky about random details like this.
Anyway, nicely done! This story offers some good insight into both characters and the dialogue read easily as well.
| IVIaedhros 12/4/07 . chapter 1
Cute...I can definitely see the influences of One Year, but you've added your own bits as well.