Rowan Seven
2008-01-01
ch 1,  | abuseWhen I read the teaser for this fic, I figured it would either end in a Ryouga x Kasumi pairing or with Kasumi cooking P-chan. I'm glad the latter wasn't the case, although the former might have been somewhat cute. Anyway, I enjoyed reading this story. It was a nice "everyday" look at one of the more "mundane" experiences Ryouga might go through and a compelling examination of his situation. Your choice of words was effective and the narrative flowed smoothly enough. The only thing I might strongly recommend you work on in the future is your perspective jumps. The change from Akane to Ryouga to Ranma and then back to Ryouga's point of view seemed a little rough to me. Anyway, thanks for sharing your work. |
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