 Sirilac 2009-11-09 . chapter 16Woah. WOAH! Look how many chapters its been since a slip up xP
Yeah, your problem here is that she was working in the weinerlicious and you didn't (at least I didn't see) explain the switch.
They came back from the Weinerlicious and suddenly Sarah's telling Chuck she needs to get her orange-orange uniform.
Huh? |
 Sirilac 2009-11-09 . chapter 12Yeah, um you may not have noticed, but even at the moments in which she is MOST upset with Chuck, Sarah will still go along with orders and act out the cover.
Although I can easily see them having an argument like this (end of chapter 12) Sarah would not argue over going as his cover as it is part. of. her. job. |
 Sirilac 2009-11-09 . chapter 9Her eyes were BLOATED?!?
BLOATED?
The ** are you ON, kid?
Were you thinking of maybe bloodshot? Cos that would make a hell of a lot more sense.
(end of chapter 9) |
 Sirilac 2009-11-09 . chapter 7you've obviously never actually ATTEMPTED to mouth the words "ha ha ha".
Yeah. Doesn't work, does it?
Miming laughter I can see, but try and go for the physically possible. |
 Sirilac 2009-11-09 . chapter 6Another repetition of Xmas |(
Also, Sarah doesn't seem the type to say "Oh my gosh!" I would personally have her say something like "Oh, Chuck... I- I'm sorry I-" blah blah blah.
Also, I can't see Morgan using the word 'anecdote', he would have been more likely to say "...was telling us this funny story..." |
 Sirilac 2009-11-09 . chapter 5And for the love of god can you PLEASE put christmas instead of xmas it makes you writing seem so much more professional and less like a fangirl/tv advert |
 Sirilac 2009-11-09 . chapter 4Still reading but thought I'd point something out.
At the end of chapter 4 you mention that Sarah felt a bit quizzy.
The **?
I think you may have meant queasy - nauseated/unpleasant sensation in the stomach.
Either way, am having fun reading xP |
 TeddyLupin67890 2009-08-21 . chapter 18Loved this story. The development of the relationship between Sarah and Chuck was fairly realistic and I loved the way you described Sarah's trip to accepting motherhood. I would have liked to read a scene about whether Sarah was cool and collective during childbirth, or if she throw a scalpel at Chuck (oh the possibilities).
Anyways, I loved the story and I hope that you start a new Chuck fic soon. |
 DanielHimura 2009-07-20 . chapter 18Nice story, really is, very well written characters, especially the insecurities and feelings.
Love Liv too. And Yeller the dog.
I like the funny parts too, specially when they make fun of Casey´s clothes. |
 Agent-Lizziebeth 2009-06-29 . chapter 18I think once upon a time I read this but I happened upon it today with the new epilogue added. I have to say it was so good, I have enjoyed it so much, I'm sad that there isn't more. I want to thank you for giving us more, because like you, I hate when you are reading a fic/or watching a movie and they end it right when the couple works out that they want to be together and you are left wanting more. So, thank you, for giving me more. I would love a sequel or something new from you. Thanks. |
 Gord429 2009-06-19 . chapter 18easily in my top 5 fics ever EASILY. THank you so much for writing this wonderful bit of fanfiction it will honor my favorites list, as will you, for all time! |
 NickyR 2009-06-18 . chapter 18This was an amazing fanfic, I am so glad that I found it on here! Its now one of my favorites! Thank you for writing on here :) |
 Jeff 2009-02-20 . chapter 7 quizzy did you mean queasy? |
 ciam4527 2009-01-05 . chapter 18Great story, it shows you took the time to fully develop this story. A joy to read. |
 Chuck.Sarah 2009-01-01 . chapter 1Dear Marybr,
I have to truly admit that I loved your fanfic. It was amazing from the beginninf ´till the end. I loved the way you writted the story, I just couldn´t stop reading it! And i loved the way you ended, I always wanted to know what happened after the "happy ending". It was one of the best fanfics ever! keep up with the good work! And I love Chuck and Sarah as a couple too, they´re just so perfect together! I´ll have to say that Chuck is my favorite tv show ever! Well, I just needed to tell you I loved the story. :p |