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| kosmokomik 2008-02-20 ch 1,  | abuseI liked how Shepard didn't go all soft and mushy here, very in-character, at least with a commander who values her time in the military. Some very awesome lines, as the previous reviewers have pointed out. Excellent work. |
| Anne Onymous 2008-02-11 ch 1, anon. | abuseVery interesting, very funny. With most Mass Effect fanfiction being of substandard quality, calling your story above average isn't the compliment it could be, but rest assured that yours is most definitely a well written piece of fiction. I particularly enjoyed the characterization of Chakwas - I wanted her role to be larger in the game, and thus was happy with that in your tale. Jane Shepard dialogue - both internal and otherwise - was brilliantly well written. I'm not sure how I feel about the frequent fragmented sentences. I suppose, as the story is very in tune with Shepard's feelings, that it fits well enough - people don't always speak in complex sentences. Still, I felt much of it interrupted the flow while reading. Another personal complaint: was it truly necessary to name your Shepard "Jane?" While it may seem more canon, I always appreciate seeing a Rhonda, or Natalie, or something of the like. Still, to each their own. |
| xboxgeek 2008-01-16 ch 1, | abuseall i can say is HAH! (sorry, i never liked kaidan anyway) BUT, that was definately interesting with Dr. Chakwas. |
| Eilam Wordsmith 2008-01-14 ch 1, | abuseOh, this is fantastic. I love your Shepard to death. I wonder what the labor will be like? Kaiden: "Breathe, Shepard, breathe! Remember your lamaze!" Shepard: "This is all your fault and if someone will give back my blaster I will KILL YOU!" Ah, the joy of birth. |
| Athena Solaris 2008-01-14 ch 1, | abuse"Galactic genocide extravaganza?" You've just made my day. Funny and dead on. Now if only Shepard could be that sarcastic in the game... |
| VoiDreamer (not logged in) 2008-01-14 ch 1, anon. | abuseOoh! I like the idea - I trust that you'll be continuing it ? Sounds AMAZING so please do! Nicely done! |
| impsy 2008-01-14 ch 1, | abuseLove it! You have such a great Shepard, I love her swearing and frustration. My favorite line, though, had to be: "Mister family man with his dad in Vancouver and his mom sending vid mails telling him to wear a sweater on Noveria because it was bound to be cold." I giggled for ages. :) |
| Little Miss Cuteness 2008-01-14 ch 1, | abuseimaginitive problem for Shepard to deal with^^ makes an interesting change for her to be dealing with more everyday issues like a normal person~ and it's dead on accurate^^ well written too, and funny at points~! |
| Uilleand 2008-01-14 ch 1, | abuse*whew*...gutsy take on it. And Shep's voice is strong and clear. Very good! (...I'd like to think society a couple hundred years from now would have a handle on pharmaceutical contraceptives, tho...hehehe) |
| Sho-ro Eyez 2008-01-13 ch 1, | abuseO, I like it so far. It's original and well written. Update soon! |
| NChawk 2008-01-13 ch 1, | abuseI was wondering if someone would write about this. I had been thinking about what happens sometimes after those one night stands.Shepard reacted just as I thought she would.At least a Shepard who loved being a soldier. Great story. Can't wait to read more. |