OMG please update as soon as possible! i have to know what happens next, and i cant wait to see more Bardock :D
please please please update son!

Great Story!!

damn... pan and Bra are acting like such **... This is a cool story.

im really liking the story but its not very DBZish... far to serious... no lite heartedness

anyway looking forward to more

apocalyps24

Wow, this is one of the most intense DBZ fanfics I've ever read. I think I may have to read it over to get a grip on everything.

I do have to say, that my favorite parts have been everything to do with the Son Family, especially with Goku, Chi Chi and Goten. I'm a sucker for angst, and boy do you deliver on it. Especially between Goten and Goku. I remember watching the cartoon when Goten and Goku meet for the first time. For like a 10 second scene, there is so much to be elaborated upon, and from what I've read so far, few authors deal with Goten's daddy issues.

I don't know if you plan on having those two confront each other later on, but I am hoping you do. There's just so much you could do there and what you've done so far has been great to read.

Speaking of confrontations, both Goku and Chi Chi are clueless. I can't believe Chi Chi is beating herself up about this. I really see this as a Goku problem, but I guess I feel like Chi Chi's dealt with enough drama in her life and needs to be cut a break. I thought the conversation between the two of them was great. Goku doesn't seem affected by this that weird condition as much as anyone else. Maybe it's because of trained discipline but I won't rule anything out...

I think I've missed something regarding Chi Chi's father, I'm not sure if it's because I somehow skipped over some exposition, or if it was intentionally written that way. But I hope that the next few chapters clear that up.

I guess the only kind of criticism is that there are so many different plot threads being juggled around, it's hard to keep track of them all. It's one thing if they're all connected somehow, but it all seems separate. We have the main Sayian Heat Stroke Mania thing, but then the Spiritual Powers That Be are planning shenanigans, and not only that the media is whipping the populace into a froth over the Sayians that might cause a major backlash against the three families (although the idea of building some sort of super dynasty between the Satan and the Briefs is awesome and I actually want to read a story like that). Oh and Piccolo might be pregnant with Gohan's baby (okay, I dunno if that's true but Piccolo is definitely hiding something)! It's like a soap opera on steroids. If anything, I hope that I can read some exposition wrt what the heck is going on with any of these storylines. Otherwise it just becomes too overwhelming I think.

But like I said in the beginning of my review, this is easily one of the most intense fanfics I've read. I love it, it's well written and the characterizations are very good. I can't wait to read more.

Another enjoyable chapter! I really like this story; you do a great job connecting the different parts of the plot and keeping the reader involved. As always, your characterization was spot on. I especially loved Vegeta's reaction to Bra going Super Saiyan. I had only one "eh?" moment during this chapter: personally, I don't think Frieza and Cell would refer to each other as "-san." If they've become friends (of sorts) in Hell, then the "-san" is unnecessary. Also, in Japanese, one cannot call oneself "-sama" (like Frieza did); it's improper. Master Frieza works just fine.

I notice that sometimes you include Japanese suffixes and sometimes you don't. Sometimes that can take people out of the story, since some consider Japanese suffixes in English stories to be superfluous anyway. I say just choose to use them or not. :)

Anyway, I'll be waiting for chapter 25! This is a great read! ^_^

another twist huh... the never ending story

wow plz update soon

Very good,glad you wrote more

glad to see you havnt given up on this. i can't wait for another update :)

THIS IS A VERY INTERESTING STORY...WITH A LOT OF TWIST AND TURN,... YOU HAVE OX KING THING, GOHAN THING, THE SAYIAN THING, WHAT UP WITH THE TURTLE AND CHI THING... THE STORY IS BEING UPDATED TO SLOW FOR SO MUCH TO BE GOING ON

GOTEN IS THIRTY, which makes Trunks 31! Omg, they are old, and then Bra and Pan are still in like HIGHSCHOOL! This is creepy.Goten and Trunks were like 18 and 17 when Bra and Pan were like 5!

Another great update! I'm really liking this story so far. I'm curious as to what will happen to Gohan, but I guess I'll just have to wait. I hope to see some major ** kicking soon. Right now this story is the embodiment of ** kickery. Oh yeah, I almost forgot-UPDATE SOON!

omg please update! im dieing to kno the ending!

Hi there! I have to say, this is one of the more original stories I've read for DBZ. The plot device you used to change the Saiyans' behavior is quite innovative; also, it appears that you're incorporating almost all of the DBZ Universe, which is awesome. You write everyone in character, which is quite a feat, and add bits of humor here and there to entertain the reader. I especially liked when Bulma and Vegeta discover the newspaper with the headline "President of Capsule Corp. Married to Killer Alien." I laughed so hard at that. This story's really intriguing and keeps me on the edge of my seat. I also like that you incorporate little summaries of the chapter before hand. Then, if there's a character change, I'll know what's going on. I don't see many stories with Kaio or the Afterlife as depicted by DBZ, and that's a great aspect as well. How you brought Tullece in was unique and unexpected. Actually, this whole story's full of twists and turns, and I love it!

I do have a bit of concrit just regarding Piccolo and Gohan. Just to me, I'm not sure Piccolo would forgive Gohan that easily for what he did to him. (At least from what I understood, Piccolo did forgive him, so if that's not right, you may want to clear that up, or I'm just foggy-headed, lol.) You explained the situation in a tactful manner, but once that was introduced, it was sort of dismissed through the rest of the story. Videl forgave him quite quickly too. I know the problem at hand (the change in the Saiyans) is much more important, but maybe some of the hidden emotions in both Videl and Piccolo should come out to express their anger about what happened. This is just my take, though. ^^

Anyway, keep up the spectacular work! I can't wait for the next update. :D