It's good, but the Baudelaires speak a little bit too formally.

Aww! Hehe, I understand Klaus's POV

aww cute!

Oh, an interesting idea. I've never seen this done before, bravo for doing it and nice writing skills!

Only one bit of critisicm, you used 'quite' and 'rather' an awful lot, but thats not really critisicm, just maybe your writing style. Its a fantastic story and is perfect for the topic. Really well done!

This is a great story.

Nice story! Keep it going! I hope to see the finished product soon.

O find it interesting to know that Klaus thinks that it's gonna be a dude.

he's also funny about this brent dude too!

this is so cool!

hope you up-date soon!