GAH!! I forgot just how much I love your writing! That delicate way with words, the entrancing conversations, how utterly I can immerse myself in your sentences and paragraphs and forget there was ever anything else.


What I really love is the mention of Tohru...it really does seem like Aki-chan has grown that fond of her, and it just makes it all so much more wonderful, because now, no one will need to lose hope ever again! And this...this is like Kyo's triumph over his father. Akito needs this confrontation if she wants to move on. And it's strange how you tend to forget Ren (at least, I do), but she's still there, and she needs to be accounted for. And I think Akito did a great job, considering the circumstances.

I'm so glad you're still on the fanfiction roll! If you weren't here, would be missing so much!

Ah, my dearest, please forgive me for this review coming so late. I saw the alert, was in a hurry, made a mental note to come to the site and read, and lost all bloody mental post-its sometime around the start of classes this week. So, I beg your understanding.

And now, onto this wonderful piece of beauty...there is applause, and there is a lot of it. Akito and Ren was not something I expected this song to be used for, but it just...worked, magnificently. Such a lovely spin to put on things, you're a genius. How do you do it?

And, a dedication,I'm absolutely squealing over here. You're fantastically wonderful.

"Akito almost doesn’t knock on the door.

There are good enough reasons not to - it’s her house, isn’t it? Why shouldn’t she just walk in? Or better yet, why not just walk away? Only then there are the reasons to do it - it is polite, and even if it won’t start this out on the best foot (nothing will), it might make the foot less wrong. And she’d
told Tohru she was going to, which meant that the next time she saw her, Tohru would ask how it went, because Tohru never forgot these things, and if she had to tell her that she hadn’t gone through with it - she wouldn’t, though.

She knocks."
-Ok, starting out by having to paste an entire paragraph...this should clue in right here that you hooked me instantly, because the disorganized train of thought, the panic, how much she wants to leave, but not be thought badly of by Tohru, it all just ties my stomach in knots, because the franticness just...twists. It's almost painful to read, in a good way, and makes me feel deliciously uneasy.

"He soaks in every detail and waits; Ren wants to cause pain here and now."
-such an apt description, because Ren's always had so much more desperation...not so much to lose, but so much farther to fall if she did. Shigure has his time to wait, while she's running out.

"It just seems like less and less of a good idea now that she’s here. She wonders how much it hurt Kureno when she stabbed him…"
-Even when you're not ripping my heart out with a fork, you have a way of making me forget to do that breatheing thing. Something here, just how the thoughts stopped and went about-face, and all still mixed with that panic...it stops the blood.

“Yes, But what is there to say?”
“Everything,”
-It's so true. The way you've put it, everything just gets heavier right then, because there's too much, and it could all be said, but it would still be too much. It somehow makes me tired to read.

" She holds up a hand to tick things off on, though the gesture looks more like a game of Itsy-Bitsy Spider when she does it."
-That's, very unsettling. Really all I can say...that line, put where it is, adds a tinge of that sinister theme that stories get when the children's things go wrong.

"I want you to forgive me."
-It's just so right that she wouldn't ask, and the fact that you gave her reasons beyond simple pride just makes it all the better. She's playing in someone else's dance now, but she's still the god...old habits don't have to die.

And then, Ren's laughing just sent shivers down my spine. It seemed so surreal, and so hysterical, and it makes you feel even more pity for Akito's position, because what do you do when something you say gets a reaction like that? The ground's getting pulled askew...how do you manage to disturb me every time?

"You don’t forgive people because they deserve it. It’s done because they need it, Akito reminds herself. “Well,” she says, and stops because he loved her more, and then finishes, “I forgive you.” She is still expecting, right until then - somewhere deep inside - that things will fall in place after that."
-I had to stop reading there for a second, because even though most of it was only in the thought process, it was still just...'she stops because he loved her more.' You just...I don't know how you manage to stick the most poignant things right in the middle like that, where I'm not ready for them.

“Mother… then I’ll be here. It’s your wall now.”
-It almost makes me want to cry, and I don't know if it's from relief or what, but just, Akito finally being able to give this completely over, and not to be holding onto it anymore, and to be putting this relationship in someone else's hands...almost trusting. Like I said, I don't know, but it does make me ache, but not in a bad way, and also makes me want to hug Akito very much.

"She can wait."
-You wrap it up so perfectly here, because she's learning to take time, and she's willing to take it.

I love this so much, and as I said, I never would have thought of the song in the context of these two, but now they're branded onto it forever.

And on my list of things to give you will be the show version of this song, because the emotion in it is lovely, and (though the girl's voice is odd) it just packs a punch. I think you'll enjoy it.

And I really am sounding babbly today, so I'll wander off now...but know that I adore this immensely.

TTFN

I love Avenue Q ^_^, I know all the words to pretty much all the song, and I love this song, *would play it but watching a movie*

I like the reasoning and descriptions, make sure to check the lengths of your sentences. I like the varying sentence lengths. Some of the language sound over-formal go for a fix between formal and conversational, however I do like your plot. I am never eloquent on these reviews am I? I like how you set the mood with the descriptions of the atmosphere. It's relaxing to read this, I'm currently writing a story about Kureno and Akito meeting one-another, it ties in nicely with that, and not with my other fic where Haru goes around f'ing everyone XD. I like the way you have Akito-half admit, it makes me enjoy her character more. Nice imagery with Itsy Bitsy Spider.

Nice dynamics, it really does bring some compassion to their un-passionate relationship. Aww, I can't imagine Ren being anything like Tohru but that's part of the idea isn't it? Somehow I started feeling empty *shrugs* I wonder why? [I must sound insane saying so much in reviews and using such a conversational tone]. Nice ending ^_^
Once again great work
~Myst

Yes you have done a lot haven't you? well done! :P haha always glad to see more from you though you know this.

This must have took such guts and you showed how she felt so well her thinking as she would have done before 'why should I knock? it's my house' and then thinking of all the reasons she knows that it's good manners and that if she doesn't at least start it right and how she wants to then it could go oh so wrong and another screaming fit or violence could decend. And the fact that Tohru would ask and her imagining her smile and what she would think and how Tohru would look if she had said that she hadn't done it. And that would have been the easiest thing to do that she even went back and talked to her shows how she is determined she knows nothing can be erased and nothing can be changed but the fact that she isn't sticking her head in the sand and she can say 'I tried and did it' is worth something in the long run. *nods*

Though I wonder if she would ever be able to face Rin? with all the parralels that run through there relationship each of them reminding them of the people they hate and fear in many ways... that also would be a rather hard and impossible thing and with Rin being Tohru's friend as well... hmm I wish we knew how they all dealt with in the future you know! I dislike not knowing :P haha

Though I am curious I do see some simalarities that could indicate this relationship and why the song reminds you of these two but what's your reason? For some reason when ever I hear the silent hill song 'room of sleep' I think of these two

You lie, silent there before me.
Your tears, they mean nothing to me,
The wind howling at the window,
The love you never gave,
I give to you,
Really don't deserve it,
But now, there's nothing you can do.
So sleep, in your only memory
Of me, my dearest mother...

Here's a lullaby to close your eyes.
[Goodbye]
It was always you that I despised.
I don't feel enough for you to cry, [oh no]
Here's a lullaby to close your eyes,

It's a really slow song! though reminds me a lot