FanFiction.Net - unleash your imagination
| FanFiction.Net - unleash your imagination |
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| Far-Raiderz 2008-05-16 ch 7,  | abuseLOL! Thalissa is making Tahu's life hard! And so is Gali, by the way, but then again, being caught between two temperamental people isn't easy. |
| Far-Raiderz 2008-05-07 ch 6, | abuseActually, I do like your plot, you describe actions very well, and I love action. Anyway, don't let the lack of reviews deter you, cause it shouldn't if you like your story enough to post it. |
| toolazy 2008-05-03 ch 6, anon. | abusewell this story is pretty good i think, hope you update soon :) |
| J. Price 2008-05-03 ch 6, anon. | abusehahaha. What if the one ou sick all those entites on os extremely powerful and an unknown adversary? |
| Avin Airodu 2008-05-02 ch 6, anon. | abuseHey, this is one cool fic, yo! Update soon, ya hear?! I love Toa/OC pairings! Can you do a Takanuva/OC pairing? Please? |
| Twilight 2008-04-19 ch 5, anon. | abuseadkfhakf. ;_; I don't know how this managed to slip under my radar for so long. Kinda' rare to find both a good romance, and I don't think I've seen any human/toa pairings before this...nice nice. It's perfect as far as I'm concerned. XD I found it a little weird how he suddenly was like -mask off!- But maybe that was me misreading something. |
| Shay Moonsilk 2008-04-17 ch 4, | abuseLOVE IT!! What's gonna happen next? Please update! |
| dark raven0 2008-02-16 ch 1, | abusethe beginning is unique to this type of plot line, and it's very refreshing. :) Some of the wording is a little awkward such as: "'Need a fly–ride back to Ga-Koro?' he asked, a little unhappy.' the sentence itself is fine, it you just need some better descriptive words instead of "a little unhappy" try somberly, moodily or something else, okay? Other than that it looks brilliant though :) nice work |
| G'reth the Air Dragon 2008-02-12 ch 1, | abuseWow! I like how this is set up and I want to read more! Though a little tip on sound effects like "Splash": when you use them, use italics on them and, if they start out as the first sentence, then you should start a new paragraph after the sound effect. If it's something like this: "Look at me! I can-" (italic)thawck!(italic end) "-wind...fly..." (yes, that's from the Bionicle movie) But that's how I learned to do it. It's your writing style, not mine. Keep up the good work! |