Awesome! When are you gonna update again?

Cool. Oh and by the way, its Night Mother, not Dark Mother. I'm insulted...
Haha only kidding, but its still insulting...

I read, now I review...right? Right. A good story and you seem to have put some real effort into it. ^^ Keep going, I cannot wait to see what becomes of fair Mara.

I actually rather enjoyed this second chapter. I thought that it could have stood a little... more something. Description, maybe? Anyway, it seemed a tad rushed. You might have put some of her thoughts on the whole thing in there, while she was being healed by M'jaar. Something along those lines to sort of lengthen the chapter out would have been nice.

All in all, while it could stand some improvement, it'll come in time and it's got all the makings of a great fic. Just lengthen it out a tad, but not too much so that it's dragging on forever.

A lot of events are being squeezed into a small space it seems. Things would flow better if you stretched out things a little more. Both chapters had a "jumpy" feeling to them like a series of random commercials that had a common theme. Slow things down, elaborate on Mara's thoughts and experiences a little more. We're not being given much time to get a feel for the character because other things keep happening.

Also, it's safe to assume that although you may not own Oblivion many of your potential readers do. So don't be afraid to gloss over events and actions that the reader would already know about so you can focus on the portions of the story that are your own additions. Also, don't feel obligated to use the dialog from the game. Often times things are more believable if you rewrite things so that they fit your character more than a generic speech the developers came up with.

All in all not bad for a first try.

I really enjoy the start of this, and I hope you update it soon.

Just a couple of things that I'd like to mention:
I think you should deviate a bit from the usual quest chain dialogue. It makes it sound like we're just playing the game, and the responses Mara gives seems a bit out of character, at least to me.

The beginning of the story seems a little rushed, I would have taken my time with the whole killing the guard thing, set up the scene a little more.

All in all, I think you have a great story in the works, and I can't wait to read some more of it once you update it!

-Nhiilaa