...
...Crap. *cough cough* Did I say that. I meant it is a load of not very well written not very well thought and not a real fanfic at all. you could insert anyone's name and it would still make sense. it is even unclear whether the talker is male or female. so it can be used on anyone. Do not attempt to do this again. are we clear? Good. now do something more creative. like normal poetry if this is truly your work then it is good written poetry but not a fanfic.

DO NOT POST MY FANFICTION ON YOUR SITE. WAIT TO HEAR BACK FROM AUTHORS BEFORE POSTING THEIR HARD WORK WITHOUT PERMISSION!

I'm not sure I get your poem, it's still unclear no mather how many time I read it. I first thought it was about how Konata is the center of Kagami's world but I was confused after that... I've found a tiny error too: "She seems to almost to be glowing brightly..."

I hope I didn't sound too criticising... ^^' If you work on it it'll be pretty good I'm sure.