This story was mediocre. It wasn't bad, and it wasn't great. It was just - good. It would've been better if you had made your own events within the story instead of just recreating the events from the manga and making them your own. Also, more detail would be better. There was like - none. And try putting spaces after periods in a row like this: "Hello... how are you?" that just really bugged me. X3

You managed to keep Kyoko very in-character and joyous like herself; there wasn't a lot to go on so basically everyone was. Except, I noticed Kyoko called him "Mister Black" - it's "Master Black".

Anyway, decent story. I just can't tell you how many horrible stories there are out there... ;-3

Much love ♥

~Kittie

OMG that is my favorite episode (13) Plz update!

Um is this a series? if so what is it about? seems to be ur just retelling the story so far, but I think that it's very entertaining XD

This is kinda funny. If this is your first fic, then I'd advise you to try some humor fics. Nice story, later.