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| skenshingumi 2008-05-10 ch 3, | abuseI really enjoyed the list of Kaoru's faield chem labs. I thought you did a very good job building the tension in this chapter and yet keeping the internal voices real and light. |
| skenshingumi 2008-05-10 ch 2, | abuseInteresting, I didn't expect that there would be so much sexual tension between Sano and Kaoru. Somehow I don't think that will last once she meets Kenshin. You might want to note that the beaten drunk probably got vicious (nasty) rather than viscous (thick, sticky) remarks. Overall, though I thought your writing was clear and direct. |
| sapphireracoongal 2008-04-10 ch 3, | abuseThis does definitely look like it is going to be a very exciting and sensual story!! Hope you will update soon k!! |
| Bitten by a cow 2008-04-09 ch 2, | abuseUm, Kaoru's 18. Not 17. Please, change your rating. I'm pretty sure that if you have more than 3 f-words, it has to be rated M. Well, I can't honestly tell you that I like this. Nightclubs and sensual comments and gestures rather make me sick. I think that I should be done reading, else I'll start screaming and flaming. You had a good beginning there: Kenshin being a strange beast that devours tigers was interesting, but you rather threw it away with the whole nightclub chapter and the sex references and profanity. That's all I can say. Bitten Smile! :) God loves you! P.S. Heh, that whole lecture, and now I'm trying to sound all nice. I am. But please, take out all of your sensual comments and such, and I'd be glad to keep reading. |
| Bitten by a cow 2008-04-09 ch 1, | abuseWhat what? Is this placed in present-day or something? Okay, let me be honest: I think that Kaoru wearing an immodest dress is just terribly unlikely, since she was brought up wearing swords, not sleazy outfits. I can see Megumi wearing clothes like that, though. And I can see Sano blushing. Heh. The other thing is, I think you need to spell check and check through all of your punctuation to fix it up a bit. It was a little confusing to read, but I enjoyed it. Onward! To the next chapter! Bitten Smile! :) God loves you! |
| Obsequious101 2008-04-05 ch 3, | abuseI love this story! Especially the bit in chapter 2 -He was going to blow his ** head off. Lol i thought that was so cool because it kinda showed how dangerous Kenshin is. Aww poor Sano...will he find someone else? Great chapter, i cant wait for the next one! |
| Kenjutsu2Princess 2008-04-03 ch 1, | abuseHey I figured I should finally review sorry I haven't had time to yet. You're story has a lot of potential. Welcome to the site. Anyway, the beginning is captivating. I love the epilogue it's beautifully written. I can't wait to see what you write next! Until next time Happy Writing! |
| doggywuppy 2008-03-28 ch 2, | abusei totally love your story it was awsome plz update soon |