Cute.

I very much like the short story and thought there was nothing wrong with it.
How about this for a new title A Heart to heart.

Sweet!


HawkAngel

I really enjoyed reading this! I love how they were both so embarrassed to call each other by their first names! Well done! You should really continue this, because your writing style was very playful and entertaining. I know I'll check back all the time for updates. Keep up the good work!!
-alairia

like the fic very much! Since you suggested anew title - how about "hearts' confidence"? if not I hope that somehow puts you a direction more towards your liking!

~Vixen519

Aww...very sweet!

Not at all cheesy, but very cute! I really liked it! Bravo!

Aww. So sweet :)

don't worry about it being cheesy...the ending fits the story's style perfectly. i really liked how you took the idea of what shy newlyweds would call each other and turned it into a whole scene.

overall, i think that it was wonderfully written, but i do have a suggestion that you should consider leaving your comments until the very end of the story. i think it disrupts the ability for the story to flow more because the reader has to stop and read your thoughts before continuing onwards. it never hurts to explain everything in the end.

great job for the first time writing romance...you should continue this or write another one just like it really soon!

Adorable! You're doing fine... wordsmithing here or there isn't even necessary.

As others have asked, please keep going!

:-)

it's terrific! a very cute scene!

How sweet! I love it!

aw that was so sweet! i luv it plz continue! and i like the title, i think you should leave it. update soon!

Cheesey is fine! That was lovely!

Keep going!

MAB

sweet