nice story-do keep writing.

I liked this short story.

Nice effort. English can very difficult, and I admire your skill, courage and perseverance it must have taken to write something in a foreign language.

I didn’t like Teela from the 200x series either. She is much nicer in the original

If you don’t mind a little bit of advice from someone that does technical writing (among other things) for a living. Keep the sentences simple for now, and try to keep them shorter. Watch the verbs, they change with form depending on what tense you are speaking in. The idiom is “love you with all my heart” not hearth.

Other than that, good job. A few small errors, but I could always tell what you meant. You covered many, many years in a very brief amount of time.

Well, your dislike of Teela really comes through. I've always thought the 200x series did her a disservice, actually. I preferred her in the original MOTU.

Your writing is pretty stilted, but in looking at your bio, it seems English isn't your first language. So it's understandable that it would be stilted.

Good effort, and thanks for sharing.