genius. pure genius.

this story is so precious it makes me sad
did Rangiku actually try to kill the baby or does she just think she did

HURRY UP! I WANT MORE!!
*IFYOU DON'T ILL SET MY FICTION MONSTER ON YOU*
Rawr!
xx
i reall love this carry on

plz finish

Thank you thank you. cant wait.

It bettr not be over, I need more emotional responses from Matsu and Shiro other than shock.

Good chapter, sad and sweet :)

Another chapter, Yay!! All in all, I enjoyed it.

I do have one complaint. (just something that seems unlikely to me *points to self*) I highly doubt even Hitsugaya is inexperienced enough to miss the fact that Matsumoto was anything beyond about four months pregnant. It would have probably been a bit more reasonable to have it where she simply wouldn't reveal the father's name, but, it's up to you. 8-)

Though Matsumoto and Hitsugaya will make wonderful parents. >.< And on that note, I look forward to the next chapter. The story still has such potential, and has achieved quite a bit of that, as well.

Until next time! Happy writing!
-Rachel Noelle

nice story! Hope you keep going

Okay, I think you're onto a decent story here, but I'd like to offer some constructive critisism.

Some of what you've written has a tendecy to be a little... hm, confusing I think, as in it is kind of repetitive, and I'm not sure if you were going for one phrase or another, both of which may make sense, but are not clearly stated. I think you've accidentally left out a few words to sort of make things clearer here and there.

I have noticed, however, that nearly everything was spelled correctly (even though I saw a few words, like fight instead of fist, but spell-checkers don't check that), but that makes any place where it might be a bit confusing easier to understand.

As they say, practice really does make perfect. You're doing well, and everyone can always improve (especially me, I love to write, and some of my stuff when I re-read I'm like "Wow, that was terrible. How did I write that and think it was good?" Lol).

If you ever need a beta reader for your stories, I'm happy to help. My strengths would be grammar and sentence structure (though, admittedly, it's not perfect) and currently the only fandoms I am very familiar with are Bleach and Harry Potter. I will grammar check anything you need help with, for any fandom, though.

Let me know if you would like my help, and continue writing. I desperately want to know how this turns out! Now, back to my own story, gotta get the next chapter up... 8-P

-Rachel Noelle

GREAT Story \(^O^)/ Its super great and yopur a great writer with a cool name (Hehe I love the name melissa because it's mine Too, YAY)

This was incredible! I love it. I have to congratulate you fo the part in which Zaraki and Yachiru died, I can't even imagine what would happen if that really happens in the manga but...you did an excellent job in writing that moment. and thislas chapter With Matsumoto pregnant and Hitsugaya inlove...excellent fic! Thanks for killing Momo1! ( I'm so evil, sholdn't say those things about bed-wetter Momo)

Interesting concept

Oh I know Toushiro will figure it out soon, that is if she still refuses to tell him. That was a very stupid thing she did going to fight hollows and she's pregnant?! I do feel sorry for Hitsu though, I remember when my sis was going through he mood swings; it was HELL! One minute she talking to you fine and then all of a sudden she's hysterically crying. I think I'll like to see Toushiro deal with that, could be quite funny. Anyway thanks for updating in a timely fashion, may it long continue!

Lol. Toshiro's so clueless. But so sweet! ^_^ I can't wait to read more.