|Reviews for And So It Goes|
| thomasquwack 5/1/12 . chapter 2
Horray for abrupt endings! well, if it is a bad story, that is. Which this story isnt. Nice job!
| FireEdge 7/8/08 . chapter 2
It DID end a bit abruptly, but it was still good. I enjoy reading about Kent being steward of Caelin and then completely ditching his duties and running off to find Lyn. I must say that I really liked that part where Kent was in the tavern. XD It made me smile. Anyway, overall, I found this story to be very feel good. It wasn't particularly deep as your stories are prone to be, so it was a nice, light read.
| Kaira Sakamoto 4/25/08 . chapter 2
Five years loomed over his head like a hanging sentence.'
I couldn't help but laugh at that, because I saw it as a funny image with Kent having an 'oh, damn' look on his face, with 'Five Years' literally above him.
Now, onto the serious stuff.
As you neared the ending, there were some minor confusions going on. I had to stop and go back, because I suddenly noticed that Lyn had joined into the scene.
Some grammar mistakes, but another reviewer already pointed that out.
I enjoyed how you used the word 'ger,' for the Sacaen huts. It gave it a more...realistic feel to it.
And, yes, the the ubrupt ending could have been written better.
All in all, a fair piece of work that deserves some praise. Angsty, with a happy ending.
| Talren 4/21/08 . chapter 2
Hmm...that was a tad...gah, can't think of the right word. Its a mixture of anticlimaticalness (is that even a word?), and a fealing that there's something missing.
I think the major weakpoint in this chapter is when Kent actually finds Lyn, alone, on a hill away from the mass of deteriorating gers. After going through the trouble of riding out getting information about her and actually abandoning his duty in Calein (this is Kent we're talking about here, if he willing to walk away from his duty for something, its GOT to be mean a lot to him) just to see her again, he just walks up to her without any consious thought. Maybe I was expecting a little more of a burst of shock and joy from Kent for a little bit.
Anyway, you do a good job of describing Kent's guilt and everything else that went through his head as Lyn told him what happened. Oh, it was nice how Kent told her his feelings, but never actually saying it flat out, which is so much like him.
| wolfraven80 4/20/08 . chapter 2
"he spotted a few scattered gers,"
What are "gers"? I couldn’t find it in the dictionary...
"part of you, sometimes."
I think you can remove the comma.
Okay my biggest question is... Sain? On a pegasus? Can men ride them? Is there precedent for that in FE? That aside, I find that after reading this I’m left with a lot of questions. I find it a bit strange that there was so little communication between the characters. What happened to Florina? Wouldn’t she have visited Lyn? And it seems odd that Sain wouldn’t have told Kent about Lyn’s being injured... Granted, iirc Hector and Eliwood at the end of the game say something about not having seen each in ten years so maybe it’s not strange at all and my head’s just in FE8 too much.
I did enjoy the reunion scene, especially how clear it is that Lyn is indeed happy to see Kent. It makes me want to read more, to see where things go from there, to see how much better their lives will be now that they’re together. I’d really love to read more about them and how they are when they’re actually together– sine I refuse to believe the end up anything but happy!
Overall a really good story! I’m glad I can always rely your stuff when I’m in a fanfic mood.
| wolfraven80 4/20/08 . chapter 1
I’ll start with the uber-nitpicky stuff, as usual.
"one that he unfortunately did not possess, and as fate would have it, he likely never would."
Comma after "and"
"Mountains of paperwork greeted him every morning, and no matter how hard or fast he worked on it, the pile never seemed to dwindle."
Just a nitpicky comment, but I find it hard to imagine there’d be that much paperwork when paper was so rare until they started mass-producing it. For a long time it was considered a huge luxury and for most of the Middle Ages parchment was used for official documents rather than paper. That was just something that occurred to me when I read this bit.
"when they had not seen him more than a day or two and became worried."
"-in–- more than a day" ?
and Lyndis, with her wind-tossed hair standing among them; a smile on her face despite everything.
Since that last bit "a smile on her face despite everything" doesn’t contain a verb, I would be best to use a comma instead of a semi-colon.
"it was as if he was there again"
–- "as if he –-were-– "
Bulgar; the town was the biggest congregation of people on the plains of Sacae.
A colon would be better instead of a semi-colon.
"but as Sain would have said,"
Since there’s a comma after "said" there should be one after "but."
I do have a bit of a quibble with the second half in that I find it sort of strange that Kent would divulge so much information to people he’s known for all a three minutes and that they would be so curious. He could have brushed off their comments easily and Kent is normally pretty reserved so why does he keep answering them? After all, in the first half of the story, it seems like he’s told no one at all how he feels but by the end of the chapter he’s telling strangers that he needs to see Lyn again. The first half of the chapter was just about perfect, though. The picture you paint of Kent in the first section is beautiful and heartbreaking. The way he begins his day by reliving his most vivid memories is telling and very nicely done. I also especially liked the bit about what she could be doing (she could be dead ... she could be happy). The idea that he can feel so strongly about someone and yet be aware of the disconnect and left to wonder is poignant. It was great!
| Edward Houshi 4/19/08 . chapter 2
Great story! What you said about words in the begining of the chapter was true. If some things are left unsaid, it can break your heart.
You are right about the ending. It doesn't seem like it should end there, but...What else could happen? It's hard to end stories sometimes. Unless you want them turning into mindless drabbles that go on for several chapters without having anything of importance happen, it's best just to end them.
Looking foreward to reading more!
| Maxmagnus20019 4/19/08 . chapter 2
Hm, pretty good ending.
Keep up the good work!
| Edward Houshi 4/14/08 . chapter 1
The anticipation is killing me already! I love how in-character Kent is, but I wonder where everyone else is now.
| Sardonic Kender Smile 4/14/08 . chapter 1
AHAHA Kent thought Lyn was married three times! xD Poor guy...
Well, I had to read this a bit fast-I saw it in a spare minute before a dentist appointment and was like "zomg it's KK!"...so if there were any mistakes, I didn't catch 'em. Anyways, for a reason I can't quite discern at the moment, I think your writing in this chapter is the best I've seen out of you. Which is weird, I know, because there's not much romance or drama or action (yet?) for you to show off with. But still, that's how I feel.
I like that Kent never told Lyn how he felt. You never, ever see that scenario-it's just too haunting a prospect O_o. I also got a good mental image of Kent imagining Lyn in sunny Sacae, while he's all alone in a dark room...wah chivalrous redhead! :'-(
Dialogue was great, so don't worry about that.
Well, I eagerly await the next chapter :-). (BY THE WAY! Have you finished your playthough yet...? xD)
| Talren 4/13/08 . chapter 1
Ah, another KentLyn huh? Well, I guess that is to be expected of you. Hmm...dialogue is your weakpoint? If it is, i'd say its a rather small one in this fic.
It's odd, as I was reading it, I got a vague feeling that i've seen something like this story somewhere...eh, maybe just concidence.
Blast, a cliffhanger, i've had a bit too many cliffhangers recently...ah well, at least it will give me something to look foward to.
| Hikaru Morinaga 4/13/08 . chapter 1
YOU. YOU MUST POST THE NEXT CHAPTER NOW. I wanna see what happened to Lyn after all of those years!
And I like your characterisation of Kent. Looks like some things never change, eh?
(pokes) I MUST KNOW WHAT HAPPENS.
| Maxmagnus20019 4/13/08 . chapter 1
Another good plot developed by an author I realise I'm reading more and more of :P
I want to see how this ends, keep up the good work!