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Reviews for: Honey - Page 1 of 30
twiinklestar
2009-08-17 . chapter 13
Hehe. I must say, you are very good with your endings. They're always.. right. There's no other way to say it, I guess.. You just always seem to end them in such fitting ways. Great work!
twiinklestar
2009-08-17 . chapter 12
(: Now this one was definitely adorable. I love the part where they're trying to get Chouji to figure out who Shikamaru loves. But there was a couple paragraphs/sentences - umm.. Lemme find it - that I didn't understand at all.

"Anything he found stressful, anything difficult he could easily deal with like nobody else could would be something he actually tried to avoid."

"Sand, green tea. Temari. He was going to her, and leaving nothing behind. Not even something to remember him by. God, was it just her or was it getting harder to breathe? She could almost feel her lung and heart give out, and she was suffocating, becoming asphyxiated in this heat. Her head was spinning, her stomach lurching as she tried to regain focus. Kiba was right. Kiba was so disgustingly right, and although she’d guessed he would be because Kiba rarely (never) got things wrong it made her sick.

He loved her. Oh, God, he loved her.

“It’s her, isn’t it?” Ino gasped, finally letting some of the blessed oxygen fill her lungs. Shikamaru looked directly at her, staring at her with those deep dark eyes she always thought gave him an air or mystery and frowned. She was right. He always had that expression when he actually got something wrong, or someone knew something that they shouldn’t. It was her. Kiba was right, Ino was right. She had been right from the start."

Those two parts, I don't understand. I don't understand what you were trying to say. The first sentence just seems to run on and the words don't fit together right. And in the paragraph, I'm confused on who the hers and shes are referring to.

But I do like how you used the repetition of them sitting on the field looking at clouds when Shikamaru announces he thinks he's in love. It's a pretty cool result.
twiinklestar
2009-08-16 . chapter 11
I always liked the idea of the meaning of flowers -smile-. They're so sweet. The part I liked the most about this one was the part where she yelled at him not to touch her because she didn't want him to be like everybody else. I totally saw it coming, but I couldn't help but "Awe!" as I read it. And YES! It's a happy one! Nobody died! But the one thing I didn't understand was about Ibiki. Why did she end up all beat up? Did he like... beat her up for trying to enter his mind? But... he knows her doesn't he? So why would he do that to her...
twiinklestar
2009-08-16 . chapter 10
-_-" And another death it is, *sigh*. I don't like the idea of them being ANBU. I'd prefer they were just jounin or something. Something that was still dangerous and ninja, but not something extremely dangerous. Something where they all have a chance to live for a little bit longer.
twiinklestar
2009-08-16 . chapter 9
Oh my goodness! This is my favorite one so far! Definitely! I love how they both worked on the story together and the characters they wrote about who were really themselves and the people they knew. This idea was really cool! I liked it a lot! I especially liked how you included random lines from the story within your narrating. And I like the last line too. Very.. fitting (:
twiinklestar
2009-08-16 . chapter 8
Awh! Yay, finally something ends well xP

About the girl who stole from you: GRR! That pisses me off. I hate it when people do that. They're so.. despicable! How can they feel pride in empty praises? STUPID PEOPLE!
twiinklestar
2009-08-16 . chapter 7
OMGAWSH! You killed 'em again! Geesh!
twiinklestar
2009-08-16 . chapter 6
Hmm... well aren't you on the kill-everybody-and-make-twiinklestar-cry rampage? xP But he lived right! PLEASE TELL ME SHIKA DIDN'T DIE! And aww, he wished for her (: Cute. I liked the cigarette scene the best. Very... bitter sweet.
twiinklestar
2009-08-15 . chapter 5
This one made me cry. It really did. I.. she.. I already knew she had died when she had disappeared the first time, but.. -tear- Shika.. I can't even say anything because I'm so sad now..
twiinklestar
2009-08-15 . chapter 4
AWH! The ending was so cute! I love the epic-ness of it all. And how Shika crossed the desert to find her. CUTE :3
twiinklestar
2009-08-15 . chapter 3
LOLS, haha! That's so cute xP Shikamaru can be my electrician any day ;) Hmm.. if I liked Temari, I would probably have felt bad for her. But when Shikamaru had let go of her wrist to kiss Ino instead.. I kinda felt like pointing and laughing. xP I'm so mean.
twiinklestar
2009-08-15 . chapter 2
Awh, I really liked this one. The part where Kiba was in it just made it all the better xP Even if he was hitting on Ino. Any fics that include Shikamaru, Ino AND Kiba, are good enough for me xD All three of my favorite characters in one fic! HURRAY. Err.. yeah, so for now, I'll probably leave you bunch of spasstic reviews until the last one. So I'm just warning you now... I'm good at reviewing! I swear! I offer tips and everything! xD Just.. not for each individual chapter. It's easier to do it as a whole.
twiinklestar
2009-08-15 . chapter 1
HARHAR, no kisses for Sai xP Don't worry, you shant feel bad for liars like him (:
ArAshiMitArAshi
2009-08-15 . chapter 30
I love the last line.

And yeah, I feel sad, too, but I hope with the end of this, you will write more and more ShikaIno. Maybe I'll do this challenge like you'd told me to, whenever inspiration strikes.

Good job!
Banana_Fritter
2009-08-15 . chapter 30
Really nice ending, though I'm sad it's over. My favourite was 'The Shadows', as it was wonderfully dark and very touching all at the same time.
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