It's great, I really like it. Honestly, I don't really know what to say as far as improvements, but I'm looking forward to more great work.

Update soon

(chuckle) I could never have done the spandex thing. I probably would've strut around nude until I figured out how to morph with pants and a bra at least. Haha.

Anyway, I'll try to get that image out and give my two cents. The part with the tiger seemed a bit lacking, as I think you could've put more description in that scene. It was like this: morph, run, scratch, look its Jen!, and back to human in five seconds.

I did enjoy the last bit. Not an annoying cliffhanger, but it does give off a "oh, what's Sarah going to screw up on later"? It's a definite interest gatherer. I hope you update quickly so we can see if that'll affect Sarah--and possibly the others--during a fight or retreat.

As far as the spelling, grammar, and so on went, you did a marvelous job. I didn't see anything that messed up the text and also those irritating, random boxes seemed to have disappeared. Good work!

--Squito

P.S. Just a random laugh, but before I reread this quickly, I put "hangover" instead of "cliffhanger" at first. (chuckle)

aw.. poor barry... poor sarah too... good chappie... i love how your showing the effects of jennifer's decision had on sarah and the people around her... well update soon later!!..

Oh, I like Barry. It's so depressing how Jen's 'suicide' affected him. Very realistic in how you've portrayed the character's reactions so well: Barry's remorse, Sarah's conflicting emotions, and even that little ** in the first chapter, who just wanted life to move on.

Okay, just a couple things you might want to patch up:

1) You accidentally pressed the Enter key during the sentence "It was a cowardly thing to do, I know. But I had to find out. The bell had rung and the halls were empty except for the few stragglers who were now watching us" in between "were" and "now".

2) “I should have tried harder and I understand if you dont want to talk to me." Don't doesn't have an apostrophe.

3) The two squares seemed randomly placed, since there is no little scene change in the chapter.

4) This wasn't in Chapter Four, but I noticed in your summary, you misspelled "soldiers".

Everything else looks to be in good shape.

I don't know if you received an e-mail from me concerning my last reviews, but I get your point. Odd that all the aliens get capitals to their species' names while we're stuck with a lowercase "h". I meant nothing rude by it.

My favorite part of this story so far--and I've probably mentioned this before--is the conflicting emotions Sarah is feeling concerning her relationship with Jen and how she keeps questioning her thoughts.

The only itch I have with this chapter is Sarah's choice of morph: tiger. I did enjoy the references to the cat's name, "Diana" (I'm a sucker for mythology), but it seems a little too coincidental that both she and Jake would have the same battle morph.

Although, I wonder if the Visser will mistake her for the leader of the "Andalite Bandits". A good chapter overall and I can't wait for Chapter Four.

Hm. That was fairly interesting. Though your delay was quite all right, I've been doing the exact same thing :) I absolutely ADORE the Twilight series. I read all three books in four days. Speaking of this, I have a question: Does the Host get better? In the middle of chapter six I gave up because of boredom. The only person I know who's read The Host is my dad, and I've learned not to ask him about books, as we have mostly different opinions. Anyway, it was a nice chapter :)

-Aly

Very nice how in depth you are with the relationships between characters, but you're making the same mistake as I said in my last review: capitalize "Andalite", "Yeerk", and "Hork-Bajir". And whatever other aliens appear. Besides that, it's starting off really good so far.

Never expected a caribou for a battle morph, but it'd be cool hearing one in the midst of a fight. What with that squeal/cry noise they make.

cool!!.. cant wait for the next update!...

(squirms in seat) Such a great start to the next book in your series! I hope Jennifer gets a big part in the next chapter, she's my fav right now. Besides one or two grammatical errors, the script flowed nicely, especially since your OOC's are believable and realistic. Update soon!

Wow, nice way to kick it off. I like it :)

-Faith