Hmm it strangely opened a few minutes later...
Nice chapter although you may be pushing the T rating

This is an awesome story but I'm having some difficulty getting chapter 9 to open...

Well I've read your whole work in one day, and I have got to say I am impressed.It is very hard to present Roronoa Zoro as a man possessed by human emotions such as love and jealousy and tenderness, not that he is not capable of feeling. But you showed it very well here. I am anxiously waiting for your next chapter. I would be very glad if you could sent it on my inbox.
As for the details, I particularly love the mix of the japanese culture and the western one.Very good thinking of presenting the swords, the tea ceremony and the clothes.
I love TashigixZoro so much xd.
As for one thing sometimes you rush the story too much for no reason.Take it easy no one will mind if you write longer chapters.Let your thoughts to be freely written on the page.
All and all I loved it!!
One thing that was a buzz-killer was the survival of that roach boy to Dracule Mihawk.But I presume you added it because you want to show Takumi as a guy worthy of winning Mihawk's respect.Although he does not deserve it >.<.
Put them to fight each other..that would be awesome!!
Can't wait!
Thanks
-Steph

I like the concept of this and the idea of the family itself; seriously, how else would notorious get the weapons they so obviously have?

I'm not sure that one such as Tashigi would be allowed to join the Marines, though, unless it was a secret. Remember when they almost didn't let Coby join just for possibly being friends with a rookie pirate?

Also, you make a lot of mention of Japanese culture in this but one of the main premises of your story ignores that culture. They would NEVER have to kiss in public or even holds in public; in fact, it would be pretty vulgar to do so, so practising for such an event is unnecessary. The hugging display in front of her father would be EXTREMELY scandalous.


Also, how could one such as Takumi survive an encounter with Mihawk? The only explanation I can think of is that Mihawk didn't find him worthy of killing. Mihawk is the sort of man that sees people's characters and judges them for it and I can't imagine him taking kindly to one who only sees swordsmanship as a means to an end.


Also, I appreciate that you are trying not to compromise Zoro's ruthlessness while still having him fall in love. The "falling in love" bit is extremely heavy handed on both sides and thus a little boring, but the idea is nice. I also really don't see Zoro being a virgin... At all.

A note on grammar: watch out for comma splices. Also, brush up on your dialogue rules, especially those for breaking paragraphs in same-speaker dialogue passages.


That being said, I enjoyed the story so far and look forward to updates. Thanks for sharing!

gah hiyaku hiyaku
im addicted finish onegai
gah its too good
hiyaku!
onegaishimasu

Hey, really great! :D

I recognize a great piece of literature when I have to read sentences several times because I get so carried away by the plot that my eyes simply skip words...
And this fanfiction is certainly one of such :D
Also, the summary by far doesn't live up with the actual story...
I really can't wait for the next chapter, I'm looking forward to it! :)

i can't wait for the next chapter..i am so anxious i don't think i can sleep any more...that was a great chapter... please update soon...

is there a particular time arc this is in of between just wana know

*mouth a gate* =O...wow. like the chapters are long i dont see that much anymore so good good

awesome. you are the reason i read fanfics. keep it up.

so sweet... why oh why they must remember their deal in the last moment. -sigh- i hope they will realize their feeling for each other. i hope it will happen soon.

it's been a long time, but well worth the wait. this is one of the most in-character and most extensively researched fics i've ever read. great work, keep it up. And update please! :)

I read your story on my PSP last night, and I remembered about Tashigi again lol. Anyway, good story! You have great chapter and it has taught me a lot of Japanese Fighting and Living Cultures too.

UPDATE!

yay an update lolz:) that was a very interesting chapter! dang i can't beleive the chance that was missed between the two, well let's see what'll happen to their relationship in the next chapt huh? update when you've got the time