I knew it! It's Tumnus' fault. Hn!

That was very cool E. Poor Tumnus, now the guilt will eat away at him. :(

Wow...very deep and thought-provoking. The story of Mir the Naiad was so heart-rendingly sad. I really wasn't expecting the ending - Tumnus' wish causing the Telmarine invasion and rule of Narnia, thus ushering in Prince Caspian. I do feel sorry for poor Tumnus, though, having to live with the knowledge of what was going to happen and the guilt of it all.

That's almost like Moses and the children of Israel having to wander the desert for forty years- until all of the disobedient ones had died. But the next generation was allowed to enter...prolly no what you were aiming for...but still :)

Very ingenious and it fits perfectly into the plot. I have no idea how you come up with this sort of stuff. I applaud you. This is going on my favourites.

Why haven't I read this one before?? I must have missed it. Anyway this was wonderful yet very freakin sad. The Stag was portrayed brilliantly, his words were wise and worth listening too. Foolish Tumnus not doing so. The way you wrote Tumnus was very interesting... Not sure if I like it, but when I think about it, I do. Everyone can be selfish and I expect that them leaving so abruptly must have hurt him very much. The part where he asks if they used their wish to leave was very heartbreaking. (yet why he would think so is lost on me. Didn't he know them?) All in all, very good E. Very deep and thoughtful. (Now, I want to know what Ed and Peter sacrificed? you've been hinting at it all over the place... Story in the making, perhaps? ...I'll shut up now.)

That is good and yet sad, but it is still good.

This story is fascinating. I love the blend of fairytale and Narnian concepts. The white stag is a character you don't hear much about in Lewis's Chronicles, so I really enjoyed the mystery you created surrounding his origins. Tumnus's wish being a means for the Pevensies return to Narnia was a great twist, although I felt sorry for Tumnus, who didn't consider the consequences, very rash and selfish. But then again, when in the worlds of fantasy and fairytale literature has a character ever thought about the various possibilities of their wish?
Excellent job.

very interesting take on why the telmarines invaded...i like it. sad though...i feel really sorry for tumnus :(

i think if i caught the stag id wish for him to tell me about himself...i always wonder about the almost offscreen characters that no one really thinks about.

Wow. That was... incredible. It is too easy to choose the selfish path, isn't it? Poor Tumnus! How wretched he must feel. I especially like how you've expressed the idea that wishes don't always happen the way we expect- very similar to the idea that God's responses to our prayers are so very unexpected and can be completely different to what we were looking for.

Dang, I wish I'd thought of this story! But you've written it far better than I ever could have. Thank you. :)

Oh, my, what a powerful story. I am quite sad at Tumnus' foolishness, though I believe I understand his folly. I have myself stared wisdom and folly in the face and chosen the low and selfish path, too many times to count. It is good to be reminded of the consequences. Selfish ambition holds its own power, and effects many more than myself.

My only suggestion is perhaps to show more of Tumnus' thoughts, his inward struggle, or I guess some description to break up the dialogue.

I very much appreciate you doing a 'connect the dots' piece, setting up the Monarchs' return to Narnia and the restoration they achieved. Amazing. Thank you.

You absolutely took my breath away with this one. Can I touch you so some of that writing magic can rub off on me? This story is inventive, insiteful, wise and JUST SO SAD! (sniff) Poor Mr. Tumnus.

The Stag was just amazing as he gave many warnings instead of granting the wish right of way. I was thinking as I kept reading, "Mr. Tumnus tell him WHEN, WHEN you want them to come back" (sigh) You have a great and wonderful talent and I thank you for sharing it with all of us fans.

Hugs,
Rolletti

Sad. I'm depressed for Tumnus but that leaves me wondering about the "what if" if he wished otherwise. I actually wonder what the Pevensies would have wished for had they captured the stag themselves?

Oh, wow. I do have to say, when Tumnus said his wish the first time, I was thinking, "YOU FORGOT WHEN, MR TUMNUS! YOU FORGOT WHEN!" Ehe.

Anyways, just one thing, only the Kings of the Golden Age sacrificed for Narnia? How so?

Katako-Chan

Wow! Just wonderful. I don't think Mr. Tumnus would actually wish for the Pevensies to come back. But it is a fascinating speculation on what could have occurred had he caught the White Stag.

FlyingFaeriesDance

Wow, just wow! This is an interesting view as to how the Pevensies eventually get called back into Narnia. I'd never imagine that Tumnus would be the indirect cause of it. And as always, you do an excellent job with writing conversations and their many intricate details. Keep up the good work! :c)