Beautiful.

OMG that song so fits for shikamaru! I never thought about it.

Ah! I completely missed this story!

...And it's a horrible thing that I did.

Beautiful work. I also adore the parentheses; each phrase seems to add an entirely new dimension to the narration. It's almost as if Shikamaru is saying, "I'm telling you what you asked for, what you want to hear-if you choose to care, then care. If you do not, accept what there actually IS.
I know that sounds kind of strange, but I got this whole passive feeling while reading this-it's just so Shika, there's this depth of opinion that he has but he's too uncaring to share. You've done beautifully AppleCore-chan. Bravo! *Confetti time*

Ah, Shikamaru. What an underwritten character he is. There isn't nearly enough fanfiction for him! So thanks for adding to the small (but growing) collection.

For me, the story is a bit short. At the same time, you covered all the bases of envying and hating the clouds. The stylistic choice to add parenthases was very, very interesting. Did it work? Most of the time. You tended to have two types of inserted comments: Correctional ones, in which Shikamaru would one thing, and then the (comment) would alter it, or clarify it. The other type was one in which the sentence still flowed, even with the comment. If you could have stuck to one type, I think that the style would have worked better. For me, at least.

Adding the song at the end gave the readers a small looking into where the inspiration for the story came from, which is appreciated. Did it tie into your story? Not really. Still, putting it at the beginning/end sets a mood, be it one the reader ends with (which is very important) or one that the reader starts with (also very important, as that affects the rest of the story).

All in all: Not bad. I just wish it was longer. PIIR-Pierrot

As always, rich of thoughts, and angsty. Nice piece of work! How's EWHS going? XD That last chapter totally blew me away :D

cool story, really fits into Shikamaru's character.

just listened to the song, very weird, even by their standards...