 NinjaSheik 2008-12-02 . chapter 2COOL STORY!
But I have to know,where did you get those chants I saw in Chapter 1?Do have anymores?I would like to use,I mean if you'll let me... |
 spygirly 2008-11-26 . chapter 1I liked it overall. The way Micaiah senses Soren, what she's thinking and feeling, the fight scene, the overall battle surroundings and atmosphere were well written. Everyone was pretty in character, only Soren seemed a little too angry. Shouldn't he have been colder? Well, maybe I'm wrong. That's just personal opinion. |
 spygirl 2008-07-19 . chapter 1 I really, really like this! You write well. Keep it up. The only problem was a tiny grammatical one--you used the contraction "you're" instead or "your" when Sothe said "you're friends are retreating" |
 Platinum Streak 2008-06-04 . chapter 1I'm very interested in the way you'll continue this. Soren and Micaiah are like opposites, even in their coloration - complete white vs. black, when she opens, he closes. And I like you writing style, it's flowing and simple, nothing too over-adjectivated...
Good touch with the spells too, they didn't feel out of place at all. It's a shame no official incantations are given.
A small correction: "She felt the feeling that was similar to her own"
This particular sentence feels awkward. "felt the feeling" is a little redundant, perhaps she can "perceive" or something like that? |
 Valk 2008-06-04 . chapter 1Well, the encounter is very interesting and realistic. I love the reference to the friendship between Soren and Ike^^. |
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