Hey, that's really good! I hope you write more!

Hilarious! How cute, as well. I liked the look at Pete and Ed starting off their reign as stupid and rebellious young guys. I also liked Oreius as a father-figure. Poor guy. Must be tough putting up with those two. Fantastic job! I thoroughly enjoyed this story.

Stupid boys, but it was very funny.

Although Oreius acted as if he was no longer angry with us, Peter and I knew differently. We knew he was waiting for the perfect opportunity to present itself in order to teach us a lesson we wouldn’t dare forget. And sure enough, in Oreius’ eyes I saw what he would never say.
Laugh now, my kings.

Hehe, General's punishment so perfect, the whole thing was brilliant, Kay. Sorry, I can't offer any solid advice or constructive criticism, but only Continue writing.

Excellent one shot idea!! I don't think Edmund and Peter would have suddenly become perfectly behaved children because they were in Narnian now. So this story shows that possible side. :-)

Just a couple things I noticed:

"Peter and I were going to have quiet a lot of explaining to do later." Did you mean "quite" ?

"I cooled you down, and now here we are" I think it might read better and make more sense if you said "and now here you are" or "and now here you both are".

Just thoughts for consideration! Keep up the good work! ~Lady Rosebud

Ha, ha! Very typical of them! Really, the term idiotic seems to fit both boys perfectly. But we love them as they are, don't we? A very funny story. Good!

ooh... ouch! love edmund!!

Y'know, when those boys screw up, they sure know how to do it in grandiose style, don't they? Gotta love 'em, though...
Between them, I'm not sure wether the phrase 'heroically idiotic' or 'idiotically heroic' fits best; though in Oreius' case, i'm pretty sure it was just the 'idiotic' part. I liked how the boys try to blame each others' brilliance on their current situation, and how, in the end, you even managed to get a bit with Peter nearly killing himself for his little brother in there... They might be foolish to the point of near-suicide, sometimes, but honestly, would those of us that love 'em best have them any other way?
Nah, I didn't think so either. :)
A hillarious story, good my friend. Loved every minute of it!
~MyBlueOblivion~

When those boys are dumb, they are dumb on a grand scale. I find it very amusing that Edmund should attribute their present situation with Peter's genius, leaving out the fact that he went along with training in full armor in the blistering heat. They're quite fortunate Oreius loves them so, otherwise the temptation to strangle the pair of them might overwhelm the good general. Clearly the blessing of good sense and reasoning skipped by the Pevensie boys.

Nicely done and a good story for a hot, hot day!

Haha- Peter and Edmund would ignore all common sense and practice out in the heat anyway. I don't envy them for facing Oreius' anger next time they train. This is great and funny.

omg do you live in new england because we are burning up here too. i loved this. Acspecally the master centaur thing, nobody realized before that the brothers needed training.

i liked it a lot.

Hee..what a thing to come in from working outside in the heat. Very nice job. Oh, I don't pity those boys with Oreius!

I have to say that you, Elecktrum, and Sentimental Star are some of my fav Narnia writers. :-) You guys have equally inspired and distracted me from writing my first Narnia story. :-)

*dies laughing* Oh sweet Lion...that was awesome, twinny!

"Laugh now, my kings."

Ouch...boy am I glad I'm not in Peter or Edmund's shoes. Boys (particularly THOSE boys) can be so stupid sometimes. ;-)

It was really nice and fitting :D Loved it!

ROFL! That's great! I love it! And it so fits! I've been dehydrated before. Heh, not fun! Well done!
~redrose7856

ohh this was good.
that sounds like something they would do.
hahh.
great job!