this is beautiful.
really beautiful.
it made me tear up.
i love this.

Ouch. That ending hit me like a ton of bricks. :( It was well-written but such a sad ending! Why do beautiful love stories have to end with such tragedy? Anyway, keep writing!

Wow... I hate it when Sora and Riku don't get together but the way you write makes me accept it. -sighs- Time to go write my own stuff so I don't die from these kinds of endings. :)

That was a beautiful story. I really like your writing style. The story was pure and sweet, and I really enjoyed it.

Keep up the good work! :D

-Lori

You've moved me to tears.
Like seriously
as soon as i read those last two parts.
BAM!
tears. there they were. Just gliding down my damned cheeks.
Now i'm crazy sad.
Poor Riku
poor Sora
DAMNIT CANCER!
=]
i loved it.

Love,
Faye Silo

-sniffs-
Aw, that was so sad! Why did Sora have to die? Your description was amazing, and you made it sound so...simple yet lovely, describing the adults as 'Other guy' and 'Sea lady'; and the little bit of shonen-ai was cute.

Poor Riku T_T. that's a sad ending for him!
But the story is pretty sweet. I like it! :)

that was... SO SAD. TT.TT I cried. Poor Riku.


Though, the second person did bug me a little.


But that's okay. The awesomeness over-powered it.

*blinks* If Kairi managed to contact Riku, why couldn't Sora have?
And why would she find Riku just to talk about the Sea-boy he met, loved, then never saw again?

And that letter REALLY needs to get re-written. It's cold, the way it is now.

You're greatly lacking in descriptions. Sure you described Sora, but that's it.
You never explained Sea Lady, the Other Guy, Bush Lady, etc. I'm trying to decide wether they were magical people from the bottom of the ocean, or just normal tour-guides.

Even with all the faults, and all of the errors, I like this story.
It's a tragic example of what could've been, what might've occured, what happiness never began.

A great first-draft.

~The Critic, Zoa

aw that was so sad!

This is such a sad ending, but I still like this story. It's really cute!

It's been ages since I've read a Kingdom Hearts story that well written. What an interesting style you have! I loved the way you described the feelings, the scenery and...everything! The ending was terribly sad though. Such a shame that Sora died...

This was so beautiful. Sad and angsty but so full of fluff and fun times that make it all worth it. Just wow.

Beautiful as always, I felt so sad at the end. I was close to crying my eyes out.

That was beautiful! It's also very different from your usual style of writing. Good job!