Your writing is exquisite and unique. The style is just right for these two. This was beautiful. I was really moved by it. When I said in the last review that the writing is like poetry, I meant that many of the things it communicates are understood (by me, anyway) subliminally, rather than by you making them explicit.
It's interesting that you always write from Vincent's point of view, but the focus is always on Yuffie.
I am extraordinarily pleased to inform you that your story, Roots, has been nominated for The Genesis Awards Best Drama Category 2010. The Genesis Awards exists to reward the authors of FFVII fanfiction that show a certain standard of grammar and formatting, relevance to canon and characterization. Your story was nominated by Youko-Kokuryuuha and passed to the preliminary reading rounds because of the quality your story possesses. On April 15th, the Shortlisting for the Genesis Awards will take place, and on June 15th the final results will be tallied and posted.
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It's like a poem, like an impressionistic painting. When I read it, I feel I'm dreaming it. The repetition of certain ideas, that might be tedious in the hands of others, build up beautifully in this story (eg, that they don't understand other people). You give run-on sentences a good name! Seriously, what I mean by this is that you clearly write run-ons because you choose to, for the powerful effect and the poetry.
I should add I also like the way you are slowly developing the many ways in which old Vincent and young Yuffie are right for each other.
There are a couple of things which didn't work for me, but why quibble? I'll be following this up.
These are so nice and sweet and wonderful and bursting with images and gorgeous words that YES.
Lovelovelove.
I adore the parentheticals and the allusions.
The scene with Vincent filling his canteen in the first one had me wowed. It's still probably my favorite part, as sad as that sounds.
You have your own set of grammar and grammar rules that has me amazed by your creativity.
But I do have some concrit. Just a touch. Since I always try to think of something.
You are very good at setting up a tone for a piece. The entire thing just reeks with the feeling. But the problem with that is that there isn't a lot of variance. I just feel like you're piling on more and more of the same emotion hoping I'll burst.
This is also not always true. You do have some tone variance, mostly noted at the end of the third piece, which feels a bit cathartic (though I can still sense the strain). However, I think you are capable of more, and that it might be an asset to your stories. Even if they're short one-shots.
Thanks for a pleasant read! I'll be looking forward to more from you.
*dances* It's morning! Way too early, but that gives me a beautiful excuse to take a break from this Yuffie-Vincent-sort-of-piece I'm trying to write and read this. YAYNESS!
Okay, first-I *heart* your writing style. It flows together in such a lovely way. In the beginning here, when Vincent first sees Yuffie and she's unmoving and silent, and then he realizes that she's actually quivering with motion-the juxtaposition was fantastic. The same thing with how he saw her smiling at him and she was very much a child, but then when he looked again she was much older. "He blinks and forgets what he saw." I really, really loved that line.
You captured Yuffie's innocence and love of life so well in the opening section.
The end of this was perfect. The way it tied back into the beginning, but there's been growth and change and realizations and GOOD GRIEF, how did I not stumble across this before in all of my Yuffie/Vincent reading? I don't ever remember SEEING it, which is just a CRIME. I loved, loved, loved, loved-okay, you get it-this piece and I am going to read the others a bit later. I want some time to absorb this first piece (yes, I need to absorb it; it was that good), and I still want to catch up on Mystic's Reefie piece and maybe, maybe I can finish this short piece I'm writing. But I will be back for some more Yuffentine absorption.
I also LOVE how you showed that Red, Vincent, and Yuffie all have trouble handling people, and that the way Yuffie does it is her outgoing nature. I hadn't seen anyone ever put it quite that way before.
The image of Yuffie sleeping against Nanaki is so stinking cute. And I can completely, completely see her doing that.
My heart breaks for Vincent and his struggles with the demons (probably literally) within him as he sees Yuffie's innocence and has the thought that he could spare her from pain.
My heart's still breaking at this whole paragraph about how it's been a long day, a long decade, a long life, and "he just wants to curl up like the little boy he isn't." AWW. :(
Gah. The scene with Yuffie in the tree was just-I have no words. Okay, I do. It was gorgeous. I loved it. Completely. And I love, again, how you wrote that Yuffie is very much alone around people and unable to connect and...that's always made so much sense to me about her and I think it's one of the reasons her friendship with these characters-all of them-is so beautiful. And I really like the theme you put throughout this piece about how when Vincent looks at her sometimes she looks old, or young, or then she just looks like her.
(Very nice touch with the downing of the sugar packet and the rolling of the apple down her shoulder.)
...
...
*wails* That scene with Aerith dying and Yuffie's reaction and Vincent's reaction and the crying and sniffling and holding and...GAHH! You're ripping at my emotions here! *sniffles* It was...you know, "beautiful" isn't even the right word for it. I don't have a right word for it! I'm WORDLESS, thank you oh-so-much. *goes to get a tissue*
This certainly seems like a culmination of pent-up frustration and rage and desperation, to me. I mean, it had to be if Vincent would stoop to backhanding and clawing Yuffie, and she to striking his spine.
The repetition made it powerful, and the allusions to Humpty Dumpty only reinforced the motif of being defeated and broken. And the poignant choice of scenery and weather helped a bit, too.
I can safely say I'm looking forward to this future fic of yours, La.
I like this. "What will Vincent do when they're gone?" has always been a question of mine, and you've responded to it without me asking. It was certainly a tear-jerker: it seemed that whenever Vincent was able to find solace, it was brutally taken from him, and thinking about that made me incredibly depressed.
The idea of Nanaki having to suffer repeated death after death and watching his clones go... why La? I wanted to cry when I read that Princess shivered and stopped.
And then, of course, the brilliant thought-child of having Yuffie fade in and out of Vincent's life, which made me ponder as to whether or not it was Vincent who was fading into and out of life. Yuffie tugging his cape along sealed the deal for me.
Hate to be a SoB, though, but you typoed near the end: "He wonders if this is her way of telling [her] something."
That should be "him," shouldn't it? Blarg, what do I know? Anywho, an excellent update.
Goodness, I almost cried at various points. It was beautiful. Vincent's sadness was palpable and I was happy to see that he finally found rest with Yuffie. I don't have much else to say except that I hope you grant us with more wonderful stories!
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